20. What are you?! — Wolf Tooth!!!!!

  Many years later, when I think back to this episode, I still feel that unspeakable shock. I sat in front of the computer for a long time and couldn't think of what words to use to describe that shock, so I had to use the cliché "thunder on a clear day" - which I usually don't like to use when creating - to describe the military factory director who took me rabbit hunting all over the mountains, and the commander-in-chief of this bird-brained unit. No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't reconcile them. It wasn't until later, after reading a few more books, that I finally understood the complex meaning of the word "human nature".

  Imagine when this father-like big black face, who knows that the child he likes so much, although they have only met once, is not willing to work in his proud special forces team because he doesn't care about it. This is his lifelong pride and dedication, how heartbreaking would he be?

  Think about it, think about it with empathy? They are all human! He is both a professional special forces officer and a father. Professionally speaking, this battalion is his life's work; emotionally speaking, which father does not want his son to inherit his legacy?

  So I insulted his career and also insulted his feelings.

  So, the blow I gave him was one that no one had ever experienced before.

  But it wasn't until many years later that I savored this.

  Big Black Face, the commander of the Special Forces Brigade. These two roles have been swirling in my mind, and I don't know how to speak anymore. Big Black Face - I can only call him that because I didn't know what else to call him at the time - looked into my eyes with a serious tone: "This is maturity; mature people won't reveal their inner thoughts so easily. If you think he's just going to curse and yell, you're dead wrong!" He spoke slowly, his words hitting hard: "Since our Special Forces Brigade was established, you are the first private to come for training and pass all the assessments to qualify for the team! But... you are also the first member to voluntarily give up your qualification after passing the assessment!"

  This tone and demeanor, absolutely not the feeling of that big black face who traveled with me, but a iron-blooded colonel who is good at giving speeches in front of green square arrays without a microphone! A iron-blooded brigade commander who commands real elite warriors! I didn't dare to speak, in his presence I couldn't even chirp, none of our entire squad could. The big black face slowly paced back and forth in front of me: "Tell me what's going on?"

  I opened my mouth but no sound came out. The big black face turned towards me: "For your brother, is it?"

  I nodded woodenly, still looking into his eyes, which had an inexplicable intimidating power that made me dare not look straight but also not dare to avoid.

  Da Hei Lian: "Is it for your Chen Pai? Miao Lian? Or is it your own revenge mentality?"

  I don't know what to say. Da Hei Lian looked at me: "Do you know why your Miao Lian, your Chen Pai and the others are here?"

  I shook my head. I really didn't know, really, how would I know? The big black face's tone softened: "Last time you told me about your brother, I said I'd tell you about mine later - I thought there was still time, but now you're leaving, so I can only tell you now - are you listening?"

  Can I not nod?! I nodded. The dark face turned to the row of young faces on the wall: "The first photo in the first row on the left, is my old classmate Zhang Mou - 44 years old when he sacrificed, was the deputy commander of our military reconnaissance brigade, with the rank of colonel - also the highest-ranking officer among the reconnaissance brigades of various military regions who died during the defensive war period! He led a reinforcement team to meet me and engaged in fierce fire with the enemy's ambush - a stray bullet hit his heart - when he sacrificed, his child was only 14 years old, his wife had been ill at home for many years, leaving behind an almost 60-year-old elderly mother, relying on making matchboxes and his posthumous consolation money to make ends meet, until today!

  That smiling face looked at me, those eyes looked at me. The dark face loudly explained the war situation in the combat zone command post: "The third photo in the second row on the left is my old subordinate Liang Mou——he was 26 years old when he sacrificed himself, my guard, in order to attract the enemy's pursuit during the retreat, he volunteered to stay behind and block the enemy, attracting nearly 200 pursuing enemy soldiers in another direction——after completing his mission, he was surrounded, out of bullets, then used a bayonet, his submachine gun was taken away, then used a dagger, finally three enemies pressed him to the ground, he detonated the glorious grenade on his chest, and died with the enemy——he had just gotten married for half a year before going to the front line, it was during the honeymoon that he received the order to participate in the military region's reconnaissance team！——after sacrificing himself, he left behind his wife and a posthumous child, his wife has not remarried until now, and is raising the martyr's offspring with hardship!"

  Those younger eyes were looking at me, with a gaze as clear as water. My tears welled up. The dark face turned to the other side: "Look at this one - fourth row from the right, first one - his name is Wang Mou, a soldier in the military region's reconnaissance battalion, my soldier! - When we were being pursued and crossed a river, he used his own flesh and blood to clear a path for us to advance! - Do you know how old he was when he sacrificed himself? - 17 years old, almost one year younger than you! - His father, a simple rural old man, raised him up, sent him to the army, and then sent him to the battlefield without hesitation! - After his sacrifice, the local civil affairs department asked his father what he wanted. Do you know what his only request was? - To give himself half of his son's ashes, so that he could accompany him every day! - When sleeping, the urn was beside his pillow, when working, the urn was at the water-drinking place - Why? He would talk to the urn whenever he thought of his son!"

  Those two children's faces, full of smiles, with simple and unadorned eyes. The dark face pointed to the photos all over the room: "Look at my brothers! All these are my brothers! This one sacrificed on the battlefield... this one died in a parachute training accident... this one was swept away by the flood peak while trying to rescue an old sheep during the anti-flood rescue! Just for a small sheep! One of my soldiers sacrificed, he was only 21 years old, not even having a girlfriend yet! Look at them! Take a good look!"

  Tears gushed out of my eyes, and I burst into sobs. The dark face glared at me: "Do you know why your Miao Lian, Chen Pai, and the others sacrificed themselves, lost an eye, became disabled - do you know?!"

  I shook my head in tears, how could I have known? I still had two days until I was 18! The big black face sneered at me: "You don't even know this, and you still dare to tell me that you're a man? You still dare to say that you're a scout? You still dare to say that you're a soldier of the People's Liberation Army?"

  All I know is crying.

  "I'll tell you what they're after -" Blackie pointed to the five-star red flag riddled with bullet holes and stained with gunpowder in the middle of the hall! "- It's for this! They're all after this flag! Do you recognize it? Do you recognize it?"

  I nodded and cried: "I know..."

  "Are you kidding me?! You don't even recognize this! This is a soldier's creed! How dare you claim to be brothers with Miao Lian and Chen Pai when you can't even identify this?!"

  I burst into loud sobs. The dark face pointed at the photos all over the room: "Now tell them! Tell them you don't want to be brothers with them! - You tell them your brain only has those few dozen brothers in your scout group! Say it! Tell them - tell them no one is worthy of being your brother except for that scout group! Say it!"

  I cried out loud: "Squad leader......"

  "You don't deserve to call me Captain! You're not my soldier! You're not my brother! You don't even deserve to be a soldier - you're just a scoundrel! Do you know what you've hurt? Is it me? No! It's them! The faith of soldiers! The honor of soldiers! Those old veterans, my good brothers! Why do we call ourselves 'Wolf Fang'? Where did this title come from?! It was given to us by the enemy! Why did they give us this name?! Because we are accurate, ruthless, our brothers are not afraid to die, our brothers dare to go to death! Do you know what it means to be a brother? Are you worthy of calling your comrades, those true soldiers, brothers?"

  I burst into loud sobs. The dark face: "Tell these full house of English souls now - they are not worthy to be your brothers!"

  I immediately fell to my knees and burst into loud sobs. The dark-faced man's eyes also welled up with tears, he slowly looked at his watch: "There are still half an hour before the gun-issuing ceremony! You remember, half an hour! — I'm telling you the truth, right now I want to kick you out of my squad! — But I'll give this little bastard who's not yet 18 years old one more chance! — Half an hour later, either you put on our Wolf Tooth wolf skin and stand on the drill ground for me; or get the hell out! My driver will take you to the train station — Why will he take you? Because if someone else takes you, your car will be stopped, and you'll be drowned by the spittle of these thousands of brothers!"

  He turned around and went out, pushing the door open with a bang. I heard the guard outside presenting arms, then the sound of his boots, as he walked away quickly.

  The door closed again. I knelt in the middle of this room full of young faces, wailing and crying loudly. They still looked at me with smiling faces. I cried so hard that my nose and tears flowed together, as if I wanted to strangle myself to death in front of these heroic spirits. As I cried, I lifted my head and saw that five-star red flag covered with bullet holes and bloodstains. I looked at this flag with tears streaming down my face, a flag I had never carefully observed before. I didn't know what stories those bullet holes and bloodstains told. Those departed heroic spirits silently watched me, dozens of eyes silently watching this idiot little soldier. With tears flashing, I gave the national flag and these heroic spirits three loud bows. When I got up, my forehead was already bleeding.

  I stood up, picked up the camouflage uniform and armband of Wolf Tooth Battalion that the company commander threw to me. I put on that black beret on my head, the 18-year-old forehead was still bleeding, tears were still streaming down my face...

  I ran for my life at the fastest speed of my life. Although the brand new leather combat boots were stiff and pinched my feet, although the brand new camouflage uniform collar scratched my neck... but I still clutched that black beret in my hand and ran desperately with my head bare.

  The big yard was quiet and silent. I rushed onto the playground, and the police team obviously received a call from the squadron leader, none of whom stopped me. The duty officer even pointed to the platform for me, and I saw more than a dozen brothers in our new training team lining up on the platform. The squadron leader stood under the military flag that almost occupied the entire back of the main stage.

  I rushed over. The playground was silent as a ghost town. Thousands of special forces soldiers stood still on the playground, their guns held to their chests like colorful nails. They were silent, their dark and thin faces with sacred expressions. I ran past their troops, their necks didn't move, but their eyes followed me.

  The captain didn't say a word. The big black face was expressionless. I ran to the end of the team and quickly put on my black beret. We went on stage, standing in a row under the military flag. The captain's thick voice came up: "The Chinese People's Liberation Army Land Force Wolf Tooth Special Forces X Annual New Team Member Armed Entry Ceremony begins - play the national anthem - raise the national flag!"

  Amidst the national anthem, the captain of the police squad and two lieutenants wearing woolen military uniforms and white gloves raised that bright red flag which I had never thought was so beautiful. We sang the national anthem loudly, our rough voices echoing through the sky. One by one, we received brand new 95 automatic rifles. When I took my rifle, I didn't dare to look up at the captain. I don't know if the captain looked at me or not, I didn't dare to look so I don't know. We stood in a separate formation below the stage, facing the main platform and with our backs to thousands of new comrades. The captain stepped forward, inspecting our formation. We all puffed out our chests.

  The captain suddenly roared at his own team: "What are you?!"

  We were all stunned, and immediately heard a chorus of roars from the rear: "Langya!!!" The ground shook.

  The captain asked again: "What are you?!"

  "Lang Ya!!!" The phalanx behind us roared again, shaking the earth in the same way.

  Squad leader: "Who gave you your names?!"

  "Enemy!!!"

  Squad leader: "Why did the enemy call you Wolf's Fang?!"

  "Because we are accurate!!!!! Because we are fierce!!!!! Because we are not afraid to die!!!!! Because we dare to go to death!!!!!" The sound of the phalanx is as loud as one person, and also as powerful as ten thousand people.

  The platoon leader scanned us new recruits: "Do you remember?!"

  "We remembered!!!" we shouted in unison, a dozen or so of us.

  The captain turned to his entire phalanx again: "What are you?!"

  "Wolf's fang!!!" I bellowed with all my might, tearing my vocal cords apart.

  "Who gave you your name?!"

  "Enemy!!!"

  "Why did the enemy call you Wolf's Teeth?!"

  "Because we are accurate!!!!! Because we are fierce!!!!! Because we are not afraid of death!!!!! Because we dare to die!!!!!"

  The sound echoes through the entire mountain range.

  It has been echoing for a long time.

  At that time, if you look from the moon, we are just a collection of insignificant small dots.

  But for me, it's - the whole world!