May 12th

  Tuesday, May 12th cloudy

  I fell into an uneasy emotional state.

  I don't have delusions of grandeur, that man who appeared yesterday is absolutely not just a figment of my imagination.

  If I could still linger in this world after death, his appearance would not be so hard to believe.

  So, was he greeting his kind, or did he have another purpose?

  I shuddered suddenly, he'd better not be here to team up with me to form some kind of fierce ghost combination to harm people. My life has become a tragedy, but I didn't plan on it becoming a horror movie! Besides, I'm neither capable nor brave... Does he want to eat me to increase his magical powers?

  I admit it, I watched too many Hong Kong ghost movies when I was a kid.

  Weihang Yun has been running to school every day, as if he wants to find some clues from the last place I went before I died. The police investigation into my suicide case was perfunctory, and I don't know how they interpreted my final journey, but it's clear that it didn't help uncover the truth. Weihang Yun asked each of my classmates who stayed in school for graduate studies, but their responses were all that they hadn't seen me that day. Then, he started showing my photo to passersby and asking if they had seen me.

  I couldn't read his mind, but watching him quietly ask passing students, I felt a mix of emotions in my heart.

  When I was alive, I wasn't Wei Yingyun's greatest joy, but after death, I became his heaviest burden.

  If heaven could let my soul stay in this world, why, why can't I open my mouth to say a word, tell Wei Xingyun, give up.

  "Ah..." I let out a sigh.

  "Ah..." At the same time, a sigh also came from behind me.

  I suddenly turned around, and behind me was that eerie black-clad man from last time.

  Our eyes met, I was tongue-tied, he smiled slightly and said: "If you want to start again, it's not impossible."

  30 seconds have passed...

  One minute has passed...

  Three minutes have passed...

  "You deceived me!" I exclaimed in disappointment, breaking the silence. "There's no change at all."

  "What did I lie to you about?"

  I glared at him indignantly: "According to the laws of transmigration or rebirth, shouldn't I have returned to my high school classroom by now?"

  "He smiled and said, 'Who says I'm going to send you back?'"

  I opened my eyes wide and stared at him: "It's you!"

  His smile deepened: "I don't have the power to let you be reborn, what I mean is, follow me and start a new life."

  "Sorry, I still have something to do." I turned around and quickly escaped, instantly moving behind Wei Xingyun. He didn't chase me, I looked back, he was still standing in the same place, smiling and waving at me, from the movement of his lips, it seemed like he said "goodbye", then disappeared.

  I was still in a state of shock and leaned tightly against Wei Xingyun's side, as if this would calm myself down.

  Not a peer nor an evil spirit, if he must be called something, it should be Oni-tsukami.

  Goodbye goodbye, never see again.

  I still have so many unresolved doubts, I still have so many loved ones that I cannot let go of, I still have a lover who is desperately searching for the cause of my death, and I even have large chunks of memories that have not been fully sorted out.

  How can I possibly go with him?

  That year, on New Year's Eve, my grandparents' home had several mahjong tables set up. The sound of mahjong tiles clattering and the Spring Festival Gala harmonized with each other. My younger siblings were running around the house, while only I and Xia Bing sat on the sofa. Xia Bing was busy texting with her head down, and I lazily leaned against the sofa, feeling unenthusiastic no matter how I looked at it.

  Such emotions have been going on for several days now.

  On the day of the holiday, the harmonious scenes of Wei Xingyun and Li Xuerong kept repeating in my mind, during meals, while reading, while walking... The more I didn't want to think about it, the more frequently it appeared.

  Although I kept comforting myself that Li Xue already had someone she liked, and she wouldn't like Wei Hangyun, while Wei Hangyun was now obviously devoted to studying and didn't have time to develop any underground romance. However, Li Xue had already been dumped by her boyfriend, what if she started liking Wei Hangyun instead? Moreover, wasn't Wei Hangyun always quite fond of Li Xue?

  I think I'm just a fool, I withdrew from Weixingyun's world by myself, and gave them more space to develop.

  I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it!

  I irritably tore off the tangerine peel on my hand, feeling both angry and regretful.

  Xia Bing raised her head and was startled by my expression, looked at the TV and then looked at me: "This person may be ugly, but it's not enough to make you so deeply disgusted?"

  "It's Chinese New Year, but you don't look happy."

  "Happy? Look at you, always distracted, what's making you so happy?"

  I shot him a sulky glance, then suddenly thought of what he said that day and kicked his shoe tip: "Xia Bing, you said I don't look like a girl at all? No way, you're just trying to annoy me on purpose, right?"

  Xia Bing glanced at me sideways: "You, so reckless and straightforward in your speech, without any reserve or tact, not gentle, not considerate, not good at understanding others. What you should be thinking about is, what makes you like a girl?"

  "No way," I leaned in, "look at me, long hair big eyes, pretty girly!"

  "You're quite confident, aren't you?" Xia Bing's palm slapped against my forehead and pushed me back. "A messy mop of yellow hair, pores so visible, still using baby face, huh?"

  "Nonsense," I protested, "I clearly have secretly wiped away my mom's..."

  "My goodness Xiamu... are you and your mom in the same age group? Why don't you just ask her to lend you two pieces of clothing, and completely walk on the path of a middle-aged woman?"

  I pouted, looking at Xia Bing with a mixture of shyness and anger. Seeing that my face wasn't right, he finally changed the subject, patted me on the shoulder, and comforted me, saying: "It's okay, you'll always be my good little brother."

  "Mom!" I shouted, "Xia Bing said you're old!"

  My mom didn't even look at me, "Nonsense, silly girl! Bang!"

  Xia Bing was moved to tears: "Auntie is so mighty!"

  Although he refused to admit Xia Bing's evaluation of me, I still dragged him out and forced him to buy a set of girl series skincare products as a New Year's gift for me.

  Although Xia Bing's face showed a thousand unwillingness, when it was time to pay, he still obediently took out his wallet. I smiled and said from the side: "Thank you, brother."

  "Thanks, brother," Xia Bing rolled her eyes and mimicked in a strange tone, "usually just bullying me, calling me Xia Bing this and that, but when buying things or meeting others, you're more eager to call out 'brother' than anyone else."

  "That's nothing," I said, hugging that bag of bottles and jars, "you're not as handsome as Brother Zhuo."

  "But," I comforted him with a smile, "you will always be my good sister."

  "Little brother~~~~"

  "Sister~~~~"

  We gazed deeply into each other's eyes, and then simultaneously let go of our hands, "Pfft!"

  In fact, Xia Bing is really a very, very, very good brother.

  Wei Xingyun and Zhuo Er did the most correct thing by coincidentally keeping my cause of death a secret from Xia Bing.

  Otherwise, I couldn't imagine how sad Xia Bing would be.

  I hope my brother will always be like that, humorous and optimistic, passionate and upright, without worries or sorrows.

  Xia Miao's life has ended, but Xia Bing must live a good life!

  Two chapters~~

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