Chapter 20: Huang San Explodes in Anger and Lu Zhishen Captures the Disciples

  Huang Shiren, this scoundrel, cheated and swindled, several jars of mountain fruit wine that was brewed out to be a lousy wine, almost choked the old Daoist, forcing the old Daoist to break his own bottom line.

  "What a huge benefit?" Huang Shiren sneered, holding the wine-filled gourd, and said in a mysterious tone: "Senior has some good tricks up his sleeve, just bring them out, I'd like to see if this huge benefit is worth exchanging for my brothers' loyalty."

  The old man nodded and sat down cross-legged, saying to Huang Shiren: "You give me all the wine as a tribute, and I'll let you kowtow three times in front of me!"

  "Kiss my mother's rotten mouth!" As soon as the old man said this, Jin Dashi was so angry that he was fuming: "Your mother, you old thing, your brain is full of shit! My big brother is a heroic man who can touch the sky and stand on the earth. He gave you wine to drink and even kowtowed to you!? You'll eat my fist!"

  Having said that, Jin Daxing swung his big fist and slammed it onto the old Taoist's forehead with a loud "whack".

  "The old man said, 'Don't make trouble!' The old Daoist waved his hand, and Jin Dashi let out a miserable cry as he transformed into a stream of light, being swept away by the fan. Who knows how many miles away he flew?"

  "Little one, this world doesn't know how many people want to kowtow three times to me, an old man. I haven't even agreed, and today you're getting off cheap with just a few jars of wine. How is that?" The old Taoist stared at Huang Shiren, his face full of smiles.

  The old man's meaning was understood by Huang Shiren.

  He wants to accept himself as his own disciple!?!

  Huang Shiren's eyes rolled around, and his mind quickly calculated: This old Taoist priest is absolutely extraordinary, although I don't know who he is, he is definitely a great master!

  If it were an ordinary time, Huang Shiren would have made such a cheap master, it's not impossible. However, he has other plans at the moment. He had offended Yun Zhongzi and provoked the Tian Jiao, so he could only go to Jin Ao Island to hug Tongtian Jiao's thigh, with the identity of Jie Jiao, Yun Zhongzi would have some scruples.

  Although this old Daoist has cultivated to a certain level, he is probably no match for the founder of the sect.

  Huang Shiren's heart wavered as he glanced at the old Taoist's gourd and purple gold calabash.

  To kowtow, or not to kowtow, that is a question.

  "Hey, senior, I can see that your skills are impressive, you're a high-ranking person. However, as a man of honor, how could I easily kowtow to someone? You tell me, isn't that right?"

  "A farting man is nothing but a yellow mouse that has cultivated for eight hundred years." The old Taoist laughed.

  Your mother! You can even tell where I come from!

  Huang Shiren's forehead sweated as he asked cautiously: "May I ask, senior, what if I don't kowtow?"

  "One slap and he's dead, gone with the wind." The old Taoist chuckled.

  "Elder brother, this is unreasonable. I haven't done anything that goes against heaven and reason. Earlier, I even saved you. You can't do this." Huang Shiren's heart was racing with fear.

  "Have you ever done anything that goes against the heavens and reason? I'm too lazy to bother with it, let alone save you. Do you think if I were really in trouble, you could save me?" The old man rolled his eyes and said: "On the other hand, you're using the reputation of Kunlun's Cow Nose Sect to swindle people everywhere. If I were to slap you dead, no one would say a second word."

  "My god! You're too ruthless!" Huang Shiren was both scared and angry: "Senior, you've gone too far!"

  "Hey old man, I've really gotten on your nerves, I've bullied you, haven't I?!"

  "Hey! You damned fool, you scoundrel! How shameless!"

  "I don't care about losing face! So what?!"

  The two men pointed at each other's nose and started cursing loudly.

  "Boy, are you going to knock your head or not?!" The old Taoist shouted loudly.

  "Knock your mother's corpse!" Huang Shiran pulled out his wind and thunder club, spat at the palm of his hand, with a look of complete recklessness.

  "Senior, you're too shameless! Take a beating from me first!" Old Huang swung his wind and thunder club, striking down fiercely.

  "Yún Zhōng Zǐ's little brat, how did the Wind and Thunder Club fall into your hands!? Haha, so amusing, so interesting!" The old Daoist saw the Wind and Thunder Club, his eyes lit up, and he burst out laughing. Without dodging or hiding, he straightforwardly stretched out his own head towards the club.

  A loud rumble! The wind and thunder were in turmoil, a dull thud.

  Lao Dao didn't lose a single white hair, but Huang Shiren was shocked to the point where his tiger's mouth burst open and his hands were crimson red.

  Good grief! With this one strike of mine, even a mountain would turn to dust and ashes. What kind of sorcery is this old Taoist priest using?!

  "Kid, this stick hit the old man very comfortably, do you want to come again..." The old Taoist smiled and was about to continue when his face suddenly changed, saying it's not good!

  "Haha, don't you know how to create a diversion!? Good baby, explode for me!" Huang Shiren let out a sinister laugh, his hands forming a seal. Suddenly, a muffled sound came from behind the old Daoist's back, and an old chrysanthemum flower was blown up into a dazzling sight!

  "You scoundrel!" The old Taoist covered his buttocks with both hands, his face red and his ears flushed, his mouth trembling.

  Although he was well-prepared, the anus is the softest and most vulnerable place on a person's body. How could it withstand Huang Shiren's despicable Golden Finger technique? The old Daoist's lower body felt scorching pain as if his anus had bloomed like a flower!

  "Senior, if this gets out, will you still have the face to live?" Huang Shiren put away his stick and chuckled slyly.

  He knew it wouldn't kill his opponent with a single blow, but this move was really satisfying!

  Haha! The old Taoist was suddenly farted on by a blooming flower, but instead of getting angry, he burst out laughing.

  This old man was actually stunned by me and his brain is no longer bright.

  Huang Shiran was stunned.

  "Hahaha, how interesting! You little rascal, you're a true descendant of my former self! As for me, the old master's path, you'll have to kowtow whether you want to or not! Thinking back to when I was young and carefree, born with the heavens and earth, countless years have passed and I've experienced everything... but being ambushed by someone like this is a first..." The old Daoist laughed maniacally.

  "Halt! Senior, what's your name?" Huang Shiren's eyes widened as if he had been injected with chicken blood.

  "What's wrong?"

  "Damn it! Don't interrupt, what was your name again?"

  "I told the old man my name is Lu Ya."

  "Master is above, good apprentice is the best in the world! The jade tree in the wind, people see and love the apprentice, gives you a bow!" Only to see Huang Shiren this cheap goods, push Jinshan fall Yu Zhuang "plop" sound kneel down at the old Taoist's feet, "clang clang clang" three loud knocks on the head, shook the ground for three times.

  He's done for, this guy doesn't care about anything, sneering and saying: "Master, you can't go back on your word now!"

  At this moment, Huang Shiren is overjoyed!

  Lu Yan! Who is Lu Yan!? This guy can be said to be the most mysterious and coolest one in Feng Shen! He is the essence of Li Huo, flying out of the Three Realms, not within the Five Elements. He does not pay homage to the Fire Cloud Three Saints Emperor, nor does he care about the Jade Pool and the Heavenly Emperor. He is not among the three teachings, nor is he in the Land of Ultimate Bliss. He does not belong to the mortal king's jurisdiction, nor does he obey the underworld. Even Yuanshi Tianzun, Taishang Laojun, and others are respectful and courteous in front of him. His Dao is profound, too deep to be measured; his seniority is high, too high to be reached!

  Especially the Manual of Precious Swordsmanship, Flying Knife that Slays Immortals, how many extraordinary immortals have died under this treasure!

  Having such a master, let alone Yun Zhongzi, even if Yuanshi Tianzun himself came to my face, he wouldn't dare do anything to me!

  What great luck! It's really incredibly good luck!

  On one side, Huang Shiren was dancing with joy, ecstatic. On the other side, Lu Ya was left stunned and bewildered by him.

  This guy was just stubbornly refusing to yield, but as soon as he heard his own name, he became so wishy-washy.

  "Little one, aren't you going to pay your respects?" Lu Ya smiled and said.

  "Haha, my good master! You're really something. If you had revealed your identity earlier, why bother with all this trouble? And I wouldn't have burst into the chrysanthemum either!"

  "What's going on?" Lu Ya didn't understand.

  Wandering around the world, a carefree and happy drifter, rarely inquiring about worldly affairs, am I really that famous?

  "Master, do you know who my idol is?"

  "How was I supposed to know?! What's an idol?"

  "Idols are the objects of worship. I've been free and easy since I crawled out of my mother's womb, not obeying heaven or earth, and even more so, I must have freedom! Whoever treats me well, I won't say a word, but whoever looks at me with disdain, I'll curse their mother! If there's a grudge, I'll settle it; if there isn't one, I'll find one! Ask the world, who can master this way? Undoubtedly, it's you, old man! Master, you are my idol!"

  "You're my role model!" Huang Shiran's saliva flew everywhere, and a string of flattering words made Lu Yadao laugh with joy.

  "Big brother, don't panic, I'm here, I've taken care of that guy!" Just as he said this, Jin Daxing flew in, covered in blood, and swung his knife to chop down Lu Ya.

  "Second brother mustn't be rude, this is also elder brother's master!" Huang Shiren burst out laughing.

  "Brother, have you gone crazy?!"

  "We've hit it big this time! Do you know who he is? He's Lu Ya Dao Ren!"

  "I don't care about his braised duck and goose! Hit his mother!"

  "Halt!"

  Huang Shiren turned his tongue, and with great difficulty persuaded Jin Dashi to calm down. He then took out all the good wine and dishes from the immortal bag, and the three of them sat on the ground, eating and drinking wildly. Old Huang was talking nonsense to Lu Ya, making him extremely happy.

  "Master, slow down, all the wine is yours, no one's competing with you."

  "Master, your drinking posture is truly unmatched, so cool!"

  "Master, there's dandruff on your beard, let me wipe it off for you. You're so naughty, Master."

  ……

  Lu Yi had a mouthful of wine and a mouthful of dishes, while Huang Shiren was massaging his back and rubbing his shoulders, making Lu Yi feel extremely comfortable.

  I've spent my whole life wandering the world, although I've had a good time, it's also been lonely. Taking on this cheap apprentice is actually not bad. Lu Ya looked at Huang Shi Ren who was busy running around and felt a warmth in his heart.

  With one breath, Huang Shiren's stored wine was drunk clean, Lu Ya belched and finally felt relieved, with a snore, he lay down and closed his eyes slightly.

  "Master, let me give you a massage." Huang Shiren walked over to Lu Ya's side and pinched the old Taoist's shoulders, making him feel extremely comfortable.

  "Disciple, you and I have already become master and apprentice, yet as your master, I still don't know your name?"

  "Oh, Master, my surname is Huang and my name is Shiren, my Taoist name is Santai."

  "Huang Shiren, Huang Santai. This name has some meaning, let's talk about it."

  "Master, the name 'Shi Ren' means to bring benevolence to the world. The Way of Heaven is not benevolent; it treats all living things as straw dogs. I think that no matter when or whether one is human or a monster, everyone wants to live a good life. So I took the name Shi Ren to constantly remind myself to seek welfare for all living beings."

  "Get lost! You're a good-for-nothing, looking out for your own interests!"

  "Master is truly wise!"

  "Stop flattering! Where is San Tai?"

  "There are three 'too's: when being a person, one must be too awesome; when killing someone, one must be too ruthless; and when robbing the beauty, one must be too precise!"

  "Not bad! Well said! Just like what my apprentice would do!"

  "Thanks for the compliment, Master!"

  Two despicable people, the older one is shameless and thick-skinned, the younger one is evil and unmatched, making Jin Daxing's eyes widen in anger.

  "Hey, Huang Shi Ren, I'm asking you, how did Yun Zhongzi's Wind and Thunder Staff end up in your hands?" Lu Ya slightly opened his eyes, a sharp light fixed on Huang Shi Ren's face.

  For Pete's sake! Which pot doesn't boil when you mention it? I've been trying to get him to forget about this for half a day, and he still remembers!

  Trouble is coming!

  Huang Shiren's headache has not stopped yet

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  Going out at night, the second watch is delivered ahead of schedule!

  Bosses, are there still tickets available? I'm begging for sponsorship, I'm begging for collection!