Chapter 6: The February Spring Breeze is Like a Knife

  Xiao Jiading slapped his forehead, wondering how he had come up with this modern phrase, and casually said: "It's the way to secretly operate in official circles to get promoted and advance. Ah, it's all about spending money and greasing palms!"

  Du Er Niu snorted and said with some disdain: "You should have just said you'd spend money to bribe me, why bother speaking those vulgar words, who can understand them?"

  Wow! "Hidden rules" has become such a trendy term, but it's now incomprehensible jargon? Xiao Jiading said: "Your grandfather is knowledgeable and familiar with the officialdom's etiquette. Let him think of a way to help me get into the government office as a clerk - make it clear, I want to be a clerk, not a yamen runner. Although I'm good at fighting, I don't want to be a yamen runner."

  Du Er Niu smiled and said: "Helping you come up with an idea is no problem. Where do you live?"

  "I live in... " Xiao Jiading's expression darkened, and he looked like he was about to cry. "To be honest with you, I'm not from Yizhou. My family is... in a very faraway place, my parents are no longer around... (Xiao Jiading thought to himself: My parents didn't exist during the Tang Dynasty, so this isn't a lie. Don't mind it, old dad and mom.) ...I was all alone, wandering everywhere, but I only found out later that I needed a letter of introduction. I didn't have one, so I had to hide here and there. A while ago, I even thought about becoming a monk in a temple because I heard you don't need a letter of introduction to be a monk. I shaved my head and went to the temple, only to find out that being a monk requires even more things, like a certificate. Without it, they would beat me with a board. I didn't have that certificate either. I couldn't become a monk, and now my hair is like this..."

  Xiao Jiading removed the kerchief from his head, revealing a short haircut.

  Du Erniao let out a snort of laughter, and then immediately sighed again, saying: "You're really pitiful, you've suffered a lot, haven't you? Don't worry, since you're such a good person, I'll definitely think of a way to get my grandfather to help you become a clerk in the government office! For my sake, as well as yours! That's right, I'll also think of a way to get you a travel permit, just fill it out according to your original household registration information. Without this, becoming a clerk is impossible, the government won't hire people with unclear backgrounds."

  "Alright! Thank you!" Xiao Jiading thought, what should I put for my hometown? The locals all have their household registrations, can't say no first, agreed and then went back to think about how to fill it out. He said: "That's settled then, tomorrow at noon, I'll wait for you outside the county government office."

  "Alright! It's settled then!"

  Just as she was saying this, they suddenly heard Mrs. Ji shouting loudly from a distance: "Er Niu, how is it? The incense has burned out quickly!"

  Du Erniu turned her head to look, and saw that Huang Shiyun had already stood up and walked to the desk to prepare for writing. Tang Rongxuan was still there with his head down in thought, so he responded with a "Coming right away!"

  Du Er Niu turned her head and looked at Xiao Jia Ding, saying: "How is it? Have you thought of a good poem?"

  Xiao Jiading smiled slightly: "When I was eating chicken and drinking wine, I had already thought of it. Otherwise, how would I have the leisure to chat with you?"

  Du Er Niu was overjoyed and said: "Come on, say it quickly! I'm listening!"

  Xiao Jiading whispered a famous poem "Ode to Willow" by He Zhizhang, a poet of the Middle Tang Dynasty.

  After listening to the poem, especially the last sentence "February spring wind is like a knife", Du Erniang was stunned, staring at him blankly. What kind of farmer is this? He's a genius! Too awesome! If there's someone like him to help in the future, not only will she be the number one talented woman in Yizhou, but also in the entire Tang Dynasty! Du Erniang smiled and stood up, just about to leave, when she suddenly thought of something and squatted down to whisper: "Is there any weakness in their poems?"

  Xiao Jiading sighed: "Their poems haven't even been recited yet, how am I supposed to know what they've written? Have them recite it!"

  "Alright!" Du Er Niu slapped her forehead and turned around to see that Tang Rongxuan had already finished writing. She said, "Madam Ji, I've thought of it. Let them recite their poems, I'll listen and compare to see if I can win."

  Mrs. Ji loudly recited Huang Shiyu's poem:

  Every day I search for spring but cannot find it

  Hemp sandals tread on clouds all over the ridge.

  Return with a smile, plucking plum blossoms and sniffing their fragrance.

  Spring is already in full bloom on the branches.

  Then, Mrs. Ji recited a poem by Tang Rongxuan:

  Flowers fall along the long river, grass color green

  Dusk mountains overlap, rain is dense and dark.

  Whenever spring arrives, I feel the drifting life is bitter.

  Today we part ways in tears.

  Xiao Jia Ding was not only forced by his parents to recite poems when he was young, but as language teachers, they also explained each poem one by one and taught him a lot of knowledge about ancient poetry. His brain was quick-witted, and soon found the flaws in these two poems, and whispered them to Du Er Niu.

  Du Erniang was overjoyed when she heard this, got up and ran back with a swing of her hips. She took a look at the incense stick, which had almost burned out. But it was enough for her to write down this seven-character poem that Xiao Jiading had taught her:

  Emerald makeup is done on one tall tree

  Ten thousand threads hang down green silk tassels.

  Who cut out the delicate leaves?

  February spring breeze is like a sharp knife.

  She was writing, Huang Shi Yun and Tang Rong Xuan were both extremely nervous watching from the side, when the last word was written, both of them were already stunned!

  "Good poem! Another wonderful poem! The first sentence compares the weeping willow to Biyu, the beautiful concubine of Sima Yi, the King of Ruanan in the Jin Dynasty. Slender and elegant, she is truly a perfect comparison. The countless hanging branches are just like Biyu's silk ribbons swaying in the wind! These two sentences vividly depict a beautiful willow tree. Even more wonderful are the last two sentences, which ask who cleverly cut out these delicate silk-like leaves? It makes one ponder, and the answer revealed in the final sentence is that it was the spring breeze, which has become scissors. Wherever the spring breeze passes, everything becomes tender green and bright red, with flowers blooming everywhere. Is there anything more ingenious than the spring breeze?"

  After Madam Ji's comment, the onlookers all applauded in unison.

  Madam Ji turned her head to look at Du Er'niang with a smile all over her face, and her eyes were full of admiration: "Er'niang, you have written two wonderful poems one after another. In my opinion, if you admit that you are the second best in this poetry gathering, no one will dare to claim that they are the first."

  Everyone applauded and nodded in agreement.

  Du Er Niu was overjoyed and burst out laughing with a silly grin on her face.

  "Impossible!" Tang Rongxuan was about to go crazy, his eyes red as he stared at Du Erniang, as if trying to see something from her. "Your previous poems were nonsense, how did you suddenly come up with such a great line? Did you plagiarize someone else's work?"

  Du Erniao's heart skipped a beat, but she didn't show any weakness. With her hands on her hips, she said: "You with the surname Tang, what nonsense are you spouting? You say I plagiarized, then tell me, who did I plagiarize from? Speak clearly! Otherwise, I won't let this drop!"

  Huang Shi Yun's originally rosy face had turned deathly pale, and she shook her head saying: "It's not plagiarism. If someone could write such a poem, I'm afraid it would spread throughout the land in the blink of an eye. How could we not know about it?"

  Tang Rongxuan was speechless, Huang Shiyun's words left him dumbfounded. They were both poetry lovers, and the poems of past dynasties were all familiar to them. But Du Er'niang's two poems were so exquisite that they absolutely couldn't have been written by an ordinary person. Anyone who could write such poems was definitely not a nobody. It can be seen that Du Er'niang had no way to plagiarize.

  He naturally could not have known that these two poems were indeed plagiarized, but they were plagiarized from the famous phrases of the Mid-to-Late Tang Dynasty more than a hundred years later, and came from Xiao Jiading, a modern society traverser 1,500 years later.

  Madam Ji smiled and said, "With these two poems, Du Erniang's name will soon spread throughout the land! I think that among all the famous poets of our time, no one can surpass her!"

  Du Er Niu's face was thick-skinned again, but she couldn't bear such praise, her chubby cheeks were slightly flushed, and she smiled awkwardly, not knowing how to respond.

  Huang Shi Yun shook her head in dismay: "I lost, I admit defeat!" She walked over and picked up the wine jug to pour a drink.

  Tang Rongxuan shouted with red eyes: "I don't agree! Her poem is good, but mine isn't bad either. Why did they rank mine lower? Even if I couldn't surpass her, at the very least we should be tied for first!"

  Mrs. Ji and others were shocked, unable to believe that Tang Rongxuan was so shameless, yet he still tried to argue his way out of this obvious fact. However, when it comes to literature, there's no first or second place, and if you really want to say that one poem is better than another, you can't come up with a reason that would make people absolutely convinced. It's just a matter of personal feeling.

  Du Er'niu saw that he was a rascal, fortunately Xiang Jia Ding had already mentioned the problem in their poem, secretly rejoicing, she crossed her arms and angrily said: "Your poem has such a big flaw, how can you be considered first?"

  "Alright, alright! You go ahead and say it, what flaws are there in my poem? Make it clear, this time it's not about the scenery in front of us, as long as it fits the spring atmosphere, that's fine. We've made it clear, if you can point out the flaws in my poem, I'll admit defeat! If you can't, then I won't be considered defeated! The two of us will be tied for first place, and neither of us will drink!"

  Madam Ji and others saw him being so shameless, they couldn't help but frown and shake their heads.

  Du Er Niu hummed, picked up his poem and recited: "The last two lines of this poem: 'When spring arrives, I feel like a withered dandelion, today we part ways, tears fall.' It's saying that when you arrive at spring, you feel pitiful like a drifting dandelion, thinking about it brings tears, right?"

  "What's wrong? Is something wrong?" Tang Rongxuan glared and asked.

  "Of course not!" Du Er Niu smiled and said: "From childhood to adulthood, have you ever left Yizhou?"

  It turned out that this flaw was Xiang Jia Ding's conjecture in his heart, such a young master would not normally go out to travel the world and suffer from wind and frost. This guess really hit the nail on the head.

  Tang Rongxuan said with a smile: "Not yet, my father says I'm still young and will go traveling after some time."

  "Since you've never left Yi state, where did your drifting worries come from? And when have you ever been separated?"

  "Must one experience it oneself in order to write about it?"

  "What you've written is emotional, but you haven't experienced such things, where did these emotions come from? You write like this, and it sounds good to say that 'young people don't know the taste of sorrow, they force themselves to talk about sorrow in order to compose new poems!' But if it doesn't sound good, then it's just pretending to be ill! Can such poetry really win first prize?"

  "Ah, young people don't know the taste of sorrow, yet they try to express it in new poems! - Er Niang, these two lines are great! Truly, they come out as soon as you speak!"

  These two sentences were copied by Xiao Jiading from the words of Song Dynasty poet Xin Qiji, pointing out his broken language. These people in the Tang Dynasty would not have known the words of the Song Dynasty. Listening to her speak casually, they are all witty remarks, and can't help but praise them again.

  Tang Rongxuan found that the woman who used to recite vulgar poems was now speaking clever phrases, which made him even more frustrated. His face turned red and white alternately, and he didn't know how to refute her.