The 25th Great Narcissus

  When Ximen Qing arrived at the Chunzi room in the Warm Breeze Pavilion, he saw Wu Song drinking heavily. At this time, there were already several empty bottles on the table, and it was clear that Wu Song had been drinking wildly. Looking again at Wu Dalang, he seemed a bit strange. This guy was holding his chin, staring at the flower lanterns on the roof, sighing and groaning, with a face full of sorrow. His originally ugly face now looked even more terrifying, with wrinkles like the cracks in old tree bark, revealing the weight of years. If others didn't know better, they would think this face was the bark of an ancient thousand-year-old tree.

  "Three inches of skin not rotten, withered tree old bark face! Husband, you've had a hard time indeed! Living is really tiring." Ximen Qing thought to himself, then walked up to Wu Dalang and sat down, asking: "Husband, how are you?"

  "Ah, brother is here, come on, let's drink!" Wu Song hastily handed Ximen Qing a jug of wine and said with a forced smile.

  Wu Dalang took a glance at Ximen Qing and then let out a sigh, continuing to stare blankly into space, lost in thought about Chun.

  Taking over Wu Song's wine, Ximen Qing pointed to Wu Dalang and asked: "Second Brother, what's wrong with your elder brother? Why does he look so listless?"

  Wu Song took a big gulp of wine, chuckled and said: "Who knows! Oh, he just said that it seems like he... fell in love!"

  "Pffft!" Ximen Qing spat out a mouthful of wine directly, splashing Wu Song's face full of it.

  Ximen Qing had a look of utter shock and said: "Second Brother, what are you talking about? Love? Love?"

  "Alas, Wu Dalang is in love, but is his mother for real? Whose daughter would be so unlucky?"

  Ximen Qing asked Wu Dalang, "Dalang, who have you taken a liking to? Tell me, and see if I can help you!"

  Wu Dalang glanced at Ximen Qing, pouted his mouth and said: "Hmph, let you help? I'm afraid you'll fall in love with her, then it will be troublesome. You are my lifesaver, I don't want to hurt your feelings! Although I am more handsome than you, but I am just a pancake seller, although I am one of the best pancake men in Yanggu County, but still can't compare with the wealth of the Ximen family. Nowadays girls are so realistic, without enough money, even if they look good, it's useless!"

  "Are you more handsome than me?" Ximen Qing was stunned on the spot, and then nodded vigorously, thinking to himself: "I've always been curious, what kind of courage makes Wu Dalang so confident, so calm, can come out to scare people without fear of his unique appearance being beaten. Now I finally understand, it turns out that in his heart, he is the most handsome, everything else is just floating clouds! Damn, these floating clouds! This psychological quality is too strong, absolutely a powerful and awesome person!"

  With a sigh of admiration, Ximen Qing said: "That big fellow, don't worry, I won't like your dream lover. The kind of person who can be liked by you is not someone simple, but an extraordinary and unique existence in the world. Your vision is so high, how can I compare? Tell me, is it the beautiful aunt from Warming Wind Pavilion?"

  Like a flower, Auntie is fifty years old, with a stout and short figure, weighing 106 pounds and standing at 1.2 meters tall. Her face is etched with the lines of time, and even a pound of powder can't cover up her wrinkles. Standing next to Wu Dalang, they really are a well-matched couple, although she's a bit older. But age isn't distance, love is limitless...

  What surprised Ximen Qing was that Dalang liked Qianglian, not Ruyi's aunt.

  Dalong said: "I found that I have fallen in love with Qinglian, what should I do? Miss Qinglian's butt is so high, it's the highest I've ever seen, absolutely a good woman to give birth to children. If I can marry her, I'll definitely be able to have two children in one year and ten children in three years! By then, our Wu family will have descendants, and many of them!"

  "Cough, cough..." Ximen Qing had an urge to die. Today he was constantly being struck down, and it was always by Dalang. Originally, Ximen Qing thought that being with Dalang would make Dalang feel inferior. But now it seemed that the one who should be feeling inferior was himself.

  Ximen Qing sighed and said, "Dalan, Qinglian is so beautiful, there are at least 800 people who like her. You saw it yourself, just now at the door, so many men were surrounding her. Do you think you can win her over?"

  When he finished speaking, Ximen Qing immediately added in his heart: "Definitely can't!"

  He nodded and said, "I've noticed that except for you and Erlang, everyone else had a lustful look on their faces. It's really embarrassing! I'm so angry just thinking about it!" He glared at Ximen Qing and said, "Brother, don't be offended when I say this, but when Qingniang invited you just now, you turned around and ran away with your tail between your legs. What a failure! If it were me, I would have definitely taken the initiative to get closer to her. Why didn't I think of pretending to be aloof? That way, Qingniang would have noticed me!"

  Seeing Wu Dalang's resentful look, Ximen Qing thought to himself, if he told him about his relationship with Qinglian, he wondered if he would strangle himself on the spot.

  However, seeing Wu Dalang's painful expression, Ximen Qing thought to comfort him, lest he be too obsessed with Qinglian and end up getting nothing. Ximen Qing said: "Dalang, actually I've seen many girls with protruding buttocks, and they're all plump, why don't I introduce you? Let me tell you, those are absolutely the kind of women who can bear children, if you follow them, they will definitely help you continue the Wu family line. Qinglian's buttocks may be protruding, but it's not certain she'll give birth to a son, you have to think carefully. Besides, to redeem Qinglian's body, you need 500,000 taels of gold, do you have that?

  "What? 500,000 taels of gold? How many buns is that worth?" Wu Dalang's face was filled with shock, and he finally shook his head, saying: "Forget it, there are too many people who can't be hanged from the same tree. You, little brother, introduce me to those plump-bottomed girls in the future, okay? Come on, let's not talk about sad things anymore, drink, drink!"

  Ximen Qing smiled and said: "Good, good, drink, drink!" Then he secretly wiped the cold sweat from his forehead.

  Wu Song turned from the wine bottle and said disdainfully to Ximen Qing and Wu Dalang, "What's there to talk about with women? Drinking is much more enjoyable. Younger brother, elder brother, second brother, here's to you!"

  ········

  After drinking with Wu Song and Wu Dalang, Ximen Qing went to find Qinglian and had a good chat. Until the sky was dark, Ximen Qing left Warming Wind Pavilion. When he returned to the Ximen Mansion, the sky was already pitch black, and the crescent moon hung high in the air.

  Ximen Qing had just sat down in his bedroom when Wu Song suddenly rushed in.

  Seeing Wu Song's excited and flushed face, Ximen Qing broke out in a cold sweat.

  This guy won't want to play with that, will he?

  "Hey, little brother, didn't you say earlier that you'd take me out to have some fun? Are we doing it now? Haha, that damned Sun Baozi, I've been wanting to teach him a lesson for a long time!"

  Ximen Qing finally breathed a sigh of relief. So it was this matter after all, easy to handle!

  Ximen Qing said: "Of course, we have to go and play. It just so happens that I will introduce you to the third absolute of our Qinghe County! Tell Erlang, the third absolute of Qinghe County is in Sun Fu's home."

  PS: Collecting...