The First Book: The Opening of the World Chapter 5: A Scene of Disappointment Amidst Wind and Rain

  Peach was still in a daze, when she saw Lu Kuan jumping around with his hands covering his buttocks, shouting "Yo ho ho" as he frantically pulled up his pants. A green light surrounded him, and he quickly inserted the needle into his leg. Ding Zhi Xuan's face turned white, and he trembled as he said, "The Flowering Grandma is angry, hurry up and work!" He hastily untied the ropes on the mule's back, picked up the sacks of grain, and rushed into the house with swift and nimble movements, clearly a seasoned veteran at doing heavy labor.

  Lu Kuan was beaten into a daze on the other side, and suddenly he had an epiphany, shouting: "I won't be lazy, I won't be lazy, let me do whatever I want to do!"

  The green light suddenly converged and transformed into a half-foot wide, three-foot long green bamboo board. A stout old woman with five big and three thick fingers held it, shouting: "Those who come to seek immortality must first let me discipline them before they can pay homage to the master! Hey, what's your name?"

  Lu Kuan pinched his buttocks and said with a sad face: "My surname is Lu, my name is Kuan, and my style name is Dazhuan... Ah..."

  The old lady said: "It's really troublesome to be so nagging, from now on just call me Little Lu Zi! Hey, Little Lu Zi, help Xiao Dingzi put away the sacks. Then soak the rice, wash the vegetables, light the fire and help Xiao Dingzi cook!" She shouted in a string of words, slowly turning around and staring at Tao Yao: "And you..."

  Taoyuan's eyes widened as she stared at the old woman. She saw that her hair was white, and she was nearly sixty years old, with a face full of freckles, a waist as thick as a water bucket, arms like tree trunks, and lips with black stubble like a beard. Taoyuan took a deep breath, thinking to herself "What a fierce tigress!" She tried her best to calm down, forcing a smile as she said: "My name is Taoyuan, won't you call me Little Peach?"

  The old lady nodded, her face softened a bit, and said loudly: "I am Huāhuā Pópo! Shuǐxiān Gūniáng is my older brother's daughter, that is, my niece. Just now she came to Xiǎo Shízhài to collect millet, and told me she found a nephew-in-law, who turned out to be you? Hmm, since we are going to be family from now on, let's use more intimate names, I'll call you 'Xiǎo Yāngzi' from now on."

  Taoyao burst out laughing and crying, shaking her head secretly "What waist and belly, not as good as little Taoyao! She is the aunt of Shuixian sister, indeed one family inherits, mother and daughter are crazy in their own way."

  Just as they were thinking, the Flower Lady flashed into the house and returned in a flash, holding two yellow short jackets in her hand. "Change your clothes quickly and get to work! Xiaoyaozi also changed! To join the Emei Sect, you must first go to the kitchen for training. Only after you officially enter the sect can you wear the green robes of male disciples."

  Lu Kuan did not dare to insist, took off the costume of the young martial arts master, and changed into that helper's outfit. Tao Yao stood still on the spot, saying: "We came to worship the mountain and seek immortality, how can we be treated as slaves..."

  Before he could finish speaking, his buttocks had already received three slaps, and he was in so much pain that the hair on the back of his neck stood on end. He angrily shouted: "Old lady, why are you hitting people randomly!"

  The flower lady remained silent, her arm slightly raised and the bamboo board lifted. This time Tao Yao paid attention, staring intently at her arm, waiting to dodge when she saw the opportunity. But somehow, before the bamboo board even fell, his buttocks were slapped three more times. It seemed that the speed of the board exceeded what could be seen with the naked eye. Tao Yao was both shocked and angry, cursing: "You wicked old hag, do you have a grudge against me from a past life? You want to use force? I'm not afraid of this kind of thing!"

  The Flower Lady sneered, "Your legs are your own, who forced you to come up the mountain? Hmph, if you don't suffer then you can't become a fairy! Someone like you with a hard mouth but soft bones is trash, hurry up and leave quickly, lest you delay my niece's lifelong happiness."

  The peach blossoms were startled, and she thought to herself, "I came for Xiaoxue, if I don't go through hardships, how can I show my true feelings? Besides, suffering is what I brought upon myself, no one forced me to join the Emei Sect!" With this in mind, she bent down to pick up her short jacket and changed clothes with a stifled voice.

  The Flowering Grandma nodded and said, "Hmm, seems like she's gotten it. Little Peach has some talent, Water Fairy's eyes are not bad." While praising, her hand rose and fell, a green light flashed through the air, and Peachy's buttocks received two more slaps.

  The peach blossoms were in full bloom, but there was nothing that could be done about it. He pouted and said: "Hey, hey, even listening to advice gets you beaten up?"

  "Ah, this is the 'Killing Dignity Board', it's great for relieving tension and smoothing out your qi. If you dare to talk back again, the 'Killing Dignity Board' will be waiting for you at any moment!" With a swift motion, she swung her arm and slapped Lü Kuang's waist with the bamboo board, shouting: "What are you standing there like an idiot for? Hurry up and go wash the vegetables!"

  No one dared to say another word. The wooden ox and the flowing horse walked back to the warehouse on their own. The three young men followed the instructions of Hua Po Po, sweeping the floor, moving grain, chopping firewood, fetching water, and bustling in and out to prepare dinner. Lu Kuan was born into a wealthy merchant's family, how could he have done household chores? He was flustered and made mistakes, and was beaten by the board until his soul flew away. Tao Yao Yao tried to help him share the burden, but ended up making mistakes herself and getting hit by many bamboo boards. The two of them moved over a dozen bags of rice and flour, chopped open dozens of pieces of firewood, swept the front and back with brooms several times, and then sat down at the edge of the water tank to wash vegetables. They saw that the red radishes, white radishes, and green radishes were piled up like mountains. Hua Po Po instructed them that they had to wash everything clean within half an hour.

  The two of them worked their fingers to the bone, scrubbing and washing with all their might. If they slackened off for a moment, the bamboo board would fly through the window in an instant. Lu Kuan's face was streaked with tears as he muttered to himself while washing: "If I have to suffer like this for three months, it'll be the death of me! Alas, I'm carrying on my father's legacy, and I have no choice. Brother, is it worth suffering like this for a woman you've never met? Is Xiaoxue really that good? Younger brother, in my opinion, you'd better make a run for it while you still can." His words were sincere, but he himself was too afraid to escape, so he deliberately goaded Tao into taking a risk.

  Tao Yan looked at the pool in a daze and sighed: "You don't understand, if I can't marry Xiao Xue, I...I won't be able to go home."

  "But why?" Lu Kuan asked.

  Tao hesitated slightly, and then said with a sigh: "Brother Lu and I have been through thick and thin together, so we shouldn't be keeping secrets from each other. But this matter is just... Ah, it's hard to bring up. I'm from Wuling, Hunan Province, and this time I came to Sichuan as a fugitive...". The rest of the words didn't come out, as the bamboo board flew over again, making a "slap" sound on each of their buttocks. The scolding voice of the old woman came from inside the house. The two had no choice but to shut up and work busily until all the vegetables were washed clean. By then, the sun was already leaning towards the west. With great difficulty, they carried the vegetables into the kitchen, leaving the two young men exhausted, with only enough energy left to gasp for breath.

  Ding Zhi Xuan, however, showed no signs of fatigue. He tidied up the firewood, chopped vegetables, and rinsed rice, then placed the steamer basket and lit the stove. His slender body darted back and forth with energy to spare, as if he had eaten dragon tendons and tiger bones. Before long, steam rose from the steamer, and Ding Zhi Xuan began cooking a vegetable soup. The ladle on the stove was both long and heavy, resembling an eight-foot-long spear in his hands. With the ladle, Ding Zhi Xuan leaped into mid-air, hooked his legs around the beam, and hung upside down to stir the pot. Open-flower Granny nodded her head in encouragement, saying that thanks to her careful guidance, Little Ding's skills had made great progress and he would soon be a formal apprentice. Tao Lu and the others stared in amazement, feeling as if they were also hanging above the stove, like suckling pigs being roasted with oil dripping all over.

  At dusk, the disciples came to collect their meals, and Tao Yuyan and Lu Kuan were in charge of distributing them. The crowd lined up in front of the kitchen, passing cups, plates, and bowls through the window, which were filled with food and then passed out again. Repeating this process several times would even make Iron Man's waist ache. Tao Yuyan kept an eye on the nearby Emei disciples, searching for Xiaoxue's figure, but to no avail, and instead wasted a lot of energy.

  When all the disciples dispersed, they had to sweep the floor and wash the pot, and prepare the necessary items for tomorrow's breakfast. Ding Zhixuan brought a bucket of leftover rice and water from outside, and struck the "Disaster Bell" with an iron rod several times. In a moment, Tongbi Xian led five little monkeys flying over. While grabbing the leftovers, they saw that Tao Lu and others were making mistakes in their work, being hit by the bamboo board and jumping around. Tongbi Xian shook his head and said, "Heaven will entrust a great responsibility to this person, but first, he must labor his muscles and bones, starve his belly, and beat his buttocks..." The two young men glared with anger, wanting to twist its head off and make it into a monkey mushroom.

  Finally, in the evening, Ding Zhi Xuan brought three large bowls of white rice, accompanied by salted vegetables and millet soup. Lu Kuan's eyes gleamed with excitement as he pounced on the food like a wolf. The once elegant young master had become a clumsy laborer in just half a day. The flower-patterned old lady was extremely pleased and rewarded him with a few slaps on the back, which she considered encouragement. Lu Kuan bowed his head, repeatedly praising the old lady's effective teaching methods.

  After dinner, he lay down to sleep. Taoyao took off his pants and touched his skin. The place where he was hit was not broken or swollen, and the skin was intact. Only then did he believe in the magical board of Hua Kai Po Po. Later, he closed his eyes for a long time, but unfortunately, his mind was flooded with thoughts, and he couldn't sleep no matter how hard he tried. In her sleep, Hua Kai Po Po snored loudly through the thin wooden board, startling Mu Gou to bark wildly as well. For a while, strange noises echoed back and forth, with "huffing" sounds on one side and "woof woof" sounds on the other. They pushed each other to new heights, piercing the ears and shocking the heart, enough to drive people like Niu Yu Sheng and others crazy.

  Lu Kuan was extremely tired and fell asleep as soon as he lay down. Ding Zhi Xuan thought it was normal and quickly fell into a deep sleep as well. Only Tao Yao Yao tossed and turned, hearing the sounds of snoring and dogs barking in harmony, her brain felt like it was being pulled back and forth by steel wires. She barely made it through half the night, when the morning light outside the window began to appear, she finally fell into a daze. Just as she had fallen asleep for a short while, suddenly there was a loud noise on the roof "Wooooo..." that shook the tiles. Tao Yao Yao sat up with a start and said miserably: "My god, this place is chaotic all day long, what kind of paradise is this?!"

  Ding Zhi Xuan stood in front of the station, holding a broom and sweeping the floor. He shook his head and said, "Did I wake you up? Alas, that plague dragon has been wailing since before dawn. When I arrived, I was also dizzy from the noise."

  "What is the plague dragon?"