Chūn Guāng Zhèn Hái Zài Chūn Guāng Zhèn Hái Zài (43)

  Good books are read every day, good websites are visited every day, good posts are topped every day. Good books are read slowly, and there is a beauty like Jade in the book. This is the Golden House, this is the Rice Flower Bookstore.

  I thought: "If he didn't have a girlfriend, he should like me."

  From young to old, I almost never fell down, whatever I wanted, my dad would give it to me. Probably before I went to elementary school, my parents got divorced, and my mom remarried a man, later they settled in the United States, so for me, I basically have no impression of her. The most common phrase I heard during my growth was that the uncles and aunts around me said: Director Xu, Shenshen is really your treasure.

  Yao Li's expression was hesitant and difficult: "Deeply, it's not that everything you want will come true, especially love."

  It's possible that Lu You really has a girlfriend.

  After the Art Appreciation class on Thursday afternoon, I saw them in the cafeteria. The girl had a simple ponytail, long straight hair, light gray sweater and jeans, with a green plaid woolen coat outside; calm and mature between her eyebrows.

  Lu You had lunch with her deskmate and chatted naturally. He, who didn't talk much, seemed to have a lot to discuss with her, without any unnaturalness or awkwardness.

  I'm so jealous of their tacit understanding, and I've been remembering her appearance in my heart all day: she looks older than me, more mature than me, quieter than me; my hair is much shorter than hers, my legs are a little thinner, maybe even longer, and her clothes and that big poor-quality leather bag look really rustic, and Yao Li also said I'm prettier than her.

  But all these put together are not as good as Lu You smiling at her once. The words they exchanged while eating were more than the total number of words I've exchanged with Lu You in so many classes.

  I feel like I've completely lost, both my momentum and confidence have collapsed like a landslide.

  The more I think about it, the more heartbroken I become. This feeling of longing for something that can never be is just too despairing. I returned to my dorm and burst into tears, then packed up my things and went home to recover from my emotional wounds for a while.

  This is a real "post-breakup period". I'm not in the mood for anything, watching movies, TV shows or listening to love songs all remind me of Lu You. My emotions are really complicated, on one hand, I think he's great, excellent, steady, smart and quiet, there's no better guy than him in this world; but such a good person doesn't like me.

  When I go out to play cards and play ball with friends, everyone comes in pairs, and I sit alone on the side watching these loving couples. Out of sight, out of mind, I pick up the cue stick and walk with Fu Andong to the billiard table for a game. He's so lucky that it makes me want to cry, he can hit the ball into the pocket from across the entire table.