Chapter Forty-Four

  I finally made it out of the shelter's gate, and as I walked away, those two derelict guards didn't utter a word of reminder, "You gotta come back early. If you're late, we'll be in trouble." I responded with a mouthful of agreement, "Yeah yeah."

  "He emphasized: 'Half an hour.'"

  "Really? Really... No way! You think I'm joking?" I said.

  A certain door in the shelter suddenly slammed shut, followed by footsteps. We all thought something was wrong. The guy who rushed out was a confused dragon. He suddenly didn't want to sleep anymore, and my method reminded him.

  That guy rushed out with such momentum that the mud egg retreated in fright, while Man Han's temperament was straightforward and he charged forward to grab the gun that had been comfortably thrown on the sentry post. Ming Long gave Man Han a hard push, causing Zhen Da Ren to almost vomit blood after hitting the wall, but he didn't care about the consequences and went straight out the door.

  The muddy egg rolled away a few meters and shouted: "What's going on! What's going on!"

  The dragon head also shouted: "Find someone!"

  I helped him explain: "Find his wife!"

  The dragon glanced at me sideways, "Have you seen my wife?"

  I spread out my hands, I'm not really afraid of him, "Nope."

  "What's it to you?" Then the guy strode off hastily in the opposite direction, and Muddy Egg and Man Han finally got their hands on a gun, but the hesitation of pulling the trigger was no better than having no gun at all.

  "I warned the two of them: 'Be careful, this is also a killer king, a man from the Northeast's old forest who doesn't need a gun to kill more than those with guns. With just a knife and an axe, there isn't a bone that won't be crushed under his fists. You're tougher than Japanese soldiers, do you want to try?' "

  Man Han shook his head firmly, while Ni Dan poked him firmly in the back and remained motionless.

  So I comforted them in front of the children, "Don't worry, his appetite is so big that no one can afford to feed him except the army. He'll have to crawl back before dinner. Have I ever lied to you?"

  Then I went in the direction I wanted to go without hesitation.

  I wandered through the alleys like a maze of Zen, last time I walked here it was raining, the alley was like a waterfall, and I was madly thinking of going to see a woman.

  I never liked the collective life of the army, where everyone's secrets are exposed. I knew that after Mie Long finished his punishment, he would come back and eat his share of food, and still not believe that he had lost his family. Meng Fan wanted to know what was going on, but all twenty of them already knew. A full bosom that could bury oneself in and forget one's worries seemed like it should be everywhere, but from the day I met Xiao Zui, I understood that it could only come from someone with a name like hers.

  No matter how much I thought about it, they all boiled down to five irrefutable words: He wants to sleep with women.

  This time I recognized the road and walked much more lightly. I couldn't help but notice that every household we passed by had a small oil lamp placed at the door, covered with tiles and lids, still lit in broad daylight - I thought it might be some local strange festival.

  At the corner where I first encountered dog meat, I heard a low growl from another dog, which really scared me out of my wits and made me break out in cold sweat. Then I saw a scrawny little dog barking at me, I took a step forward, in this starving world dogs don't feel safe around humans either, it immediately ran away.

  So I walked to the corner of that alley, listening to Xiao Zui's chickens making low sounds in Xiao Zui's yard. I took a look at the Bagua on Xiao Zui's door, it was upside down.

  I returned to the corner of the alley, sat down by another family's door, and looked at the sky above the wall. The clouds here are always changing unpredictably, just like my mood now.

  It's always good to be alive.

  I've crawled out of piles of dead people many times, but today I suddenly remembered that I'm only 24 years old. Waiting outside Xiaozui's house, I realized I'm still alive, in pain and sweetness, my hair roots trembling with excitement, a fool for first love.

  Chapter Ten

  I've started studying the oil lamps around me. My mind must have matured more than last time, so the time doesn't feel as long as I thought it would be. When the clouds outside my window changed completely, the courtyard door creaked open, and I turned my head almost to the wall corner, not wanting to look at a man who had just touched Xiao Zui. The man only said "Let's go", while Xiao Zui responded with "Come again". I listened as the man's footsteps passed by behind me and faded away - but what concerned me more was the sound of the door closing from Xiao Zui.

  I rushed towards the just-closed courtyard gate and started knocking on it urgently, even banging my forehead against the door.

  After seeing the open door, Xiao Zui's face changed from astonishment to surprise, and her immediately flushed face made me become a steady man.

  This steady man began to dig into his bulging pockets, one on the left and one on the right, two American cans that had been there for a long time. I tried my best to make it sound like a casual remark, as if a husband was bringing home groceries for his wife to cook, "Here are some canned goods."

  But she just stared at me blankly, and from this expression one thing was clear: in the past month, she had been thinking of me as much as I had been thinking of her.

  This loss of composure made me increasingly calm. I took a step back, pretending to leave, "It's on the way anyway. Then I'll go first, military duties are busy."

  I was busy with nothing, and I had to leave, but the canned goods hadn't even reached her hands. But when I nodded vigorously, I forgot that this moss-covered stone road wasn't normally slippery, and I slipped a bit, waving my two hands to keep my balance, I barely steadied myself, but Xiao Zui was about to rush out from the door to support me when she tripped on the threshold, so she tumbled out of the door and pushed me again.

  Two cans flew up into the sky and fell back down to the ground. The two of us sat on the ground, staring at each other with wide eyes. I looked at her, feeling disheartened, and scratched my head.

  "You... come in and sit down?"

  "I... wasn't standing either."

  She was clearly too embarrassed to laugh, so she didn't.

  "It's always like this. Come in," she said.

  I didn't even have the face to look at her, and I stepped into the narrow courtyard gate that could only allow one person to enter at a time. Xiao Zui rubbed against me again from behind, and I noticed that she was fiddling with the Ba Gua on the door, not turning it over or back, but simply taking it down.

  The yard is very small and has been neglected for years, most of the rooms are almost dilapidated. People living in such a place are undoubtedly frugal and don't have many demands. There are flowers planted by the wall, which are probably used to attack me, because more than half of them have been picked, leaving only a few branches, and her chickens are strolling among them. I turned back to take a look, Xiao Zui was closing the yard gate, and that gossip had already run off somewhere.

  Then we both stared blankly at each other with wide eyes.

  I immediately understood one thing, this courtyard was very dilapidated, and Xiao Zui was a person who was satisfied with very little demand, clumsy and stingy. The only place in the courtyard where people could stay was Xiao Zui's bedroom.

  People with ulterior motives have run into an awkward situation, I want to go to that place but don't want to go there immediately. The scoundrels are whispering in my ear: "He wants to sleep with women." In my heart, I weakly shout back, it's not like that... at least not all of it.

  I started to think of ways to prop up the several large stones that had toppled over, which were obviously used as stools when this courtyard was not yet desolate, and Xiao Zui definitely didn't have the strength to move them.

  Xiao Zui asked in surprise: "What are you doing?"

  I panted and struggled to get out of there, those stones were all buried in the ground, and this was obviously done by Mí Lóng. "I... uh, the yard is nice, let's sit here."

  Xiao Zui let out an "ah ya".

  I almost fell to the ground, and Xiao Zui's soft cry made me fall straight to the ground. The damn stone still didn't move an inch, I lay on the stone looking at her.

  "Wait a minute, wait a minute." After she finished speaking, she quickly entered her room, but before entering again just as quickly, handed me the can she was holding and then even more quickly went back into her room. I got up from that rock, and I'm not someone who knows how to mind my own business. In fact, even if I didn't want to look, I could still see through the window that Xiao Zui was tidying up her very messy room. I turned my head away because what she was mainly cleaning up was her bed.

  I can only gaze once more at the ever-changing clouds in this place, with one hand holding a can.

  I feel a little heartbroken because such mess comes from a man she doesn't even know.

  I no longer care; I've died seventeen or eighteen times, no, I do care, but this is indeed the human paradise that haunts my dreams amidst cold guns and shells.

  The clouds in the sky have changed again - Xiao Zui's collection is indeed not a matter of a short time.

  I was still standing there, switching to a more comfortable leg, and Xiaoxiao had opened the door and window, couldn't help but look - she had already tidied up the room, letting in sunlight and air, and was vigorously fanning the air in the house with a cloth. She saw me looking at her and hurriedly smiled, this time it was my turn to be embarrassed, I quickly withdrew my head.

  When I turned my head back, she had already come out, holding a pair of scissors and walking towards me. Her hurried pace made me take a step back, and I was worried that she would stab the scissors into my body again.

  "I'm sorry, I'm sorry." She apologized in a low voice.

  She was cutting the flowers behind me, and I watched as the few remaining branches fell under her scissors. She bustled around inside and outside the house, working with a fervor that rivaled the dragon's ability to build a coffin in an hour. She fetched a vase, filled it with water, took a mouthful, and sprayed it onto the flowers in the sunlight, making them even more vibrant than before they were cut.

  I stared blankly at the mist she sprayed, which had a rainbow color. The mist floated over, and I took a deep breath when she wasn't paying attention, satisfying my unmentionable psychology. When I turned my head again, Xiaozui was already gone.

  "Come on in! The room is a mess, it's too messy." She had already entered the bedroom.

  I walked over, deliberately lowering my head and not looking at Xiao Zui who was calling me from the bedroom.

  I dare not look at her, my twenty-four-year-old eyes have only seen desolation and war, torn limbs, shattered souls. It wasn't until I was twenty-four that I finally understood the beauty of women.

  Sorry, my eyes. I'm not looking at it for the sake of my heart, which is now jumping around like a mad dragon.

  But I had to see her, her small hut only had a bed, several stacked boxes, a table and two stools, this poor home was just cleaned up by her, the bed looked like no one had slept in it, the box and furniture were wiped clean enough to reflect sunlight, which would make people feel that the eyes are too empty, but the flowers on the table and the small wine made up for it.

  I stood at the door, holding two cans of foreign food that didn't match the humble abode, while Xiaozui stood by her desk, fidgeting with her hands. I used to do the same when I couldn't keep up with my father's demanding homework as a child. She glanced at me and then kicked open a stool with her foot, not using her hands because she was shy - there wasn't a single hint that made me think of the profession she had to resort to for survival, but precisely because of this, I couldn't help but think about it even more.

  We both tiptoed, as if afraid of startling something.

  I quietly pushed over a stool. "Oh, I know. Sit."

  I sat down, feeling awkward from the moment I entered the room. I wanted to find a place to put those two canned goods, but it seemed out of place in this room. I shifted on the stool, scanning around, and when my eyes landed on her money jar, I felt like I'd been electrocuted. I glanced at her, thinking she must have noticed, so I lowered my head, pretending not to see - so I decided to just put the canned goods on the table after all. I found that my throat was a bit dry, and my voice had changed pitch.

  "This is something... canned goods, for you."

  "Thank you." Her virtue is no better than mine, pushing a cup of water in front of me, "This is water, drink it."

  "Thank you."

  I was drinking water, but I didn't have to drink that much. I gulped down a whole cup in one go and then choked. At first, I endured it, but then Xiao Zui came over to pat my back. She shouldn't have patted me, because when she did, I spat out all the water that was still in my mouth onto her.

  I coughed violently. "Sorry, sorry!"

  Xiao Zui pounded me fiercely, "Sorry, sorry!"

  I was gradually calming down from my cough, and the little drunkard was busy rubbing a guy with a guilty conscience. The guy stared at the water stain on the table that he had spit out, Ah Yue and Dou Bing's silly souls were about to possess him.

  My family's teachings made me so nervous that I would get stomach cramps whenever I saw a woman I liked. Without thinking, I naturally forgot. The men of the Meng family should use their energy to do great things. My father pounded my head and said this, using the "Jin Ping Mei" that I had secretly read. I have been defeated by women more times than I have been defeated by the Japanese army. Later, I couldn't bear it anymore and pounced on my fiancée Wen Dai. Our clandestine trysts were even more like monkeys wrestling. Then, with a heart full of despair, I went onto the battlefield, and was defeated until now.

  Xiao Zui has already gotten out a handkerchief and is busy wiping me. As soon as I come to, I'm busy pushing her away.

  "Don't wipe me, wipe the table... and you." I found that I still hadn't used up all of it, so I took out the handkerchief she had given me when we were at Zen Da and put it on the table, neatly washed and folded. "There's more here."

  Xiao Zui was busy comforting me: "It's okay, it's okay."

  I was disheartened, but watching her encouraged me to gradually cheer up.

  Something's wrong, I know I'm going to be done for this time. I've never succeeded before, I want to succeed once here. I've died seventeen or eighteen times, charged against tanks, although I ended up being knocked down later, but I shouldn't be afraid of a prostitute.

  He said he saw a dog and rushed up to bite it, but the dog just bit his mouth hair... What is he doing?

  When Xiao Zui turned around again after tidying up the room, I had changed my posture. He was taken aback for a moment as he looked at me. Now, I was sitting on a stool with my back against the table, with one leg raised and one elbow resting on the table, my head propped up in my palm - I guess I now look like a hooligan.

  "Are you... still in pain?" she asked.

  "I'm fine. How about you?" I replied.

  "It's okay."

  I'm like a prostitute discussing payment. "I don't have money. Two cans are not enough, and you won't be full for long either. Next time I'll bring two more over."

  "....Don't want to? That's very expensive."

  "We eat every day. The grain is exchanged for our lives, but it's also a blind dispatch, this can of food may be bran next time, we don't eat for nothing, you don't take it for nothing either." I said.

  "Really don't want to. You are the savior of Zentia, you fought at South Heaven Gate, and we all cried here. Next to me is an old man burning incense, he said that this is the descent of the Heavenly Star."

  I looked down at my tiptoes, "......what star?"

  "It's Tianwei Star, Double Whips Hu Yan Zhuo, one of the Five Tiger Generals of Liangshan. Grandpa said he also fought a great battle against Jin Wuzhu. With his double whips, at the front of the Jumping Horse Pass, he let out a loud shout: 'Has the bandit Jin heard of the good man Hu Yan Zhuo from Liangshan?' Then he killed off more than 300 Jin soldiers and almost killed Jin Wuzhu himself. But Grandpa was too old, already 80 years old, and later died of exhaustion. And then there's another grandpa..."

  I looked down at my toes and wondered if I should put them down or not, "Why are there so many old men..."

  "This was a Zen-achieving old man, he didn't want to escape, so he hanged himself in the ancestral temple, the rope was already tied up, as soon as he heard that the riverbank was guarded, he stood on the stool and laughed to death." said Xiao Zui.

  I looked down at my toes which I had already put down, "...how did they all die..."

  "I don't know either. I just heard it from others. Now everyone outside is saying that Zenda was saved by your whatever Shifu, you mustn't believe it."

  I looked at her solemnly and said: "I... don't believe it."

  Xiao Zui said: "We ordinary people all know that it was you who saved us. My brother said, what's the use of strategizing in secret, those who died and couldn't return home were all brothers in arms. Now in Chan Da Cheng, everywhere is filled with lanterns, do you see? We've secretly agreed that they are offerings to you."

  I thought about it and indeed saw many of those things along the way, they were small oil lamps placed at the door, covered with a tile shed to ward off the wind, used by locals to summon souls, even Xiao Zui's door had one. When I came, I was puzzled why so many people died suddenly in this place.

  "I... didn't die," I said.

  "A lot of people have died. Everyone says they are all children from outside the village, one household brings one back home, and let them have some food and drink during the holidays. So you must not bring me anything anymore, if you want something come to my place and take it... as long as I have it."

  I sat up straight, got up dejectedly, put the stool in order and said, "Hu Yan is a compound surname, Hu Yan Zhuo is surnamed Hu Yan and named Zhuo. You should call him Grandpa Hu Yan."

  Xiao Zui was taken aback for a moment, "Huh? The old man who tells stories also calls him Hu Ye Ye, next time I'll tell him, Hu Yan Ye Ye."