Insufficient balance

  The brand new military uniform looks too big and fat on me, I have to fold the sleeves back layer by layer and stuff the pants into the liberation shoes, just to make myself look not so shabby. Touching the huge "Glory Flower" hanging on my chest, looking at the small band next to us performing "Heavenly Match", I really can't figure out if they are giving a farewell performance for this batch of new recruits or making us look like a group of circus clowns.

  Thirty or forty new recruits and seventy or eighty parents who came to see them off crowded the platform, making it impossible to move. The vendor, a middle-aged woman, smiled as she took money from the parents' hands and handed out bottles of mineral water and biscuits to us new recruits. Banners reading "One person joins the army, the whole family is honored" and "Protecting the country, steel Great Wall" kept flashing before my eyes, and with the big red flowers pinned to our chests, the red and green colors were dizzying.

  It wasn't until the train staff started urging us to hurry up and get on board that I finally took a deep breath and stepped into the carriage. Turning my head, I took one last look at the sky where I had lived for twenty-one years. The air was still murky and gloomy, as if it were about to rain. In the high altitude of over a hundred meters, a red plastic bag was dancing in the wind, twisting and turning into all sorts of strange shapes. A gentle breeze swept through the station, bringing with it a weird smell and the unique hustle and bustle of the city.

  Farewell, this familiar yet strange city. As I gaze at those young men huddled together under the wheels of a car, shedding tears like cheap trinkets, a sentiment that's hard to put into words - is it jealousy or contempt? - churns within me.

  He swung his backpack onto the luggage rack, the whole carriage had been booked to transport new recruits, and now it was empty except for a sturdy boy standing by the window. Seeing him, I really doubted whether the oversized military uniform was designed specifically for this type of person, the green uniform perfectly highlighted the bulging muscles on his body, exuding a masculine charm, plus the unintentional reveal of his mouth corner's pride and complacency, forming an unusual charm that was already enough to attract women's attention.

  He glanced at me with a hint of surprise in his eyes, and the two of us stood together, although I was a whole head shorter than him, looking much smaller. However, whether it was our posture or demeanor, we both exuded a kind of near-perfect coordination, as if we had undergone countless rigorous training sessions together and already possessed the most tacit understanding. If every move we made were to be captured in separate frames for comparison, you would be astonished at how remarkably similar they were. It was precisely this astonishing similarity that gave us an inexplicable sense of familiarity when we first met.

  He stretched out his hand and gently tapped on the glass window of the carriage, pointing at the group of tearful boys outside and said disdainfully: "I hate that kind of weak and incompetent fool. If you want to become an excellent soldier, you must learn to be strong and endure. If you can't even do this, it's better to go home early and wait for your wife to give birth to a child!"

  After a moment of silence, I slowly walked down the train and stretched out my arms against a pillar, saying quietly: "Wan Ying, are you really not going to come out?"

  A warm and soft body rushed into my arms, immediately followed by a sharp pain in my right arm. She had already left two rows of teeth marks on my arm, and a small blood flower quickly seeped out onto the brand new military uniform. The red and green colors combined together, looking incredibly resplendent.

  I was going to change into a fitting military uniform as soon as I arrived at the barracks, but I let out an almost inaudible sigh and tightly hugged her trembling body, lightly sniffing the soft girl's fragrance between her hair, and under everyone's stunned gaze, deeply kissed her.

  With an unyielding determination, I used the tip of my tongue to pry open her tightly closed lips, which were clenched together due to tension. After finding her tenderness, I gently lifted it up, bringing out a faint moan from her.

  Someone let out a wolf-whistling sound, but the sharp whistle was only halfway out before someone covered their mouth. A few soft scoldings floated into my ears: "When you get to the army, stay far away from that beastly thing. If you dare to be with him, don't recognize me as your mother anymore..."

  It seems I'm a well-known figure in this city! As the train slowly started moving, Yan Wan was still immersed in our deep kiss. Watching her frail body slowly being engulfed by the crowd, I had to hold my head high to prevent tears from falling from my eyes.

  "Actually, with such a beautiful girlfriend coming to see you off, it seems that your relationship is already extremely close?"

  It was still that new recruit who was a head taller than me, he gave me a strange smile commonly seen between men, in fact, among the whole carriage, only he didn't know my past and dared to talk to me.

  "Yes, she and I are extremely close," I stretched out my right hand, lightly wiping the tip of my index finger across my lips, bringing out a hint of her lip's flavor, calmly saying: "Her name is Fu Wan Ying, she's my woman, at the same time, she's also my younger sister, my own flesh and blood younger sister!"

  His excessive astonishment made the smile on his face also petrify like a stone, solidifying into a lump. In fact, as I declared recklessly, the entire carriage fell into a dead silence, whether it was those who knew my past or not, everyone stared at me blankly, and each person's gaze looked at me as if looking at a madman.

  There are few people in this world who dare to defy the norms, and even fewer like me who dare to openly declare it.

  Before everyone thought that boy would quickly draw a line with me, the corner of his mouth suddenly rose and he gave a big smile, and with a big slap on my shoulder like a bear's paw: "Not bad, you have personality, I like the fire-like momentum in your eyes! Twenty years ago, homosexuality was not recognized as a normal group in people's eyes, but now it has been legally recognized and protected in Western countries. Who dares to say that twenty years later, you won't become a pioneer who thoroughly liberates so-called 'moral' constraints? If you really hold a wedding ceremony, your guest seats will definitely not be empty, even if I receive your invitation from afar, I will arrive as promised!"

  This astonishing and shocking remark is undoubtedly a challenge to humanity's moral values, with gasps of cold air constantly coming from other people's mouths.

  "Let's get acquainted!" He stretched out his right hand and said: "Chang Sun Ting!"

  Fu Yuxue!

  Two hands still carrying a hint of innocence tightly clasped together, and unexpectedly I found a renewed understanding and friendship. Those who have not experienced the darkness and loneliness that I have are unable to comprehend my astonishment and ecstasy at this moment. Feeling the heavy pressure transmitted from his palm, the depression accumulated in my heart for many days was greatly alleviated.

  "Ah, that's the kind of look!" Zhang Sun Ting exclaimed, clapping his hands: "Filled with unyielding determination and pride that says 'I'll go my own way even if I'm surrounded by thousands of people'! It was from your eyes that I first sensed this spirit, which is why I took the initiative to befriend you. Believe me, just based on these eyes of yours that are full of determination and unwillingness to settle for mediocrity, your future will surely be colorful and full of challenges!"

  "I think you shouldn't join the army, setting up a stall to cheat some country bumpkins and make a living might be more suitable for you!" I swung my fist heavily onto his shoulder and said: "If you can't make it in the army, change your job to become a fortune teller! Your business will definitely not go bankrupt, even if I'm thousands of miles away, knowing that you're about to starve to death, I'll rush over on time and let you earn the first bucket of gold in your cheating career!"

  Chang Sun Ting burst out laughing and said: "Alright, it's settled then!"

  "Bang!"

  Our right palms slapped together again, and unintentionally, we made a solemn oath to protect each other as men.