Chapter 4 (Part 1) Laughing While Crying

  Woke up from a nap, feeling refreshed and invigorated.

  The sun had long been shining on our buttocks, the weather was warm and soft, the gentle breeze blew on us, carrying the strong fragrance of wormwood, making our bones feel crispy.

  "What a happy life, I wouldn't trade it for an emperor!" I shouted loudly, got up, stretched my waist, and scratched the itchy back. Hmm? Where did the beauties go?

  By the lake, near the woods, a thin layer of white gauze was pulled up at some unknown time, covering the surface of the lake. The sound of water was loud and clear, the gauze curtain fluttered, and in the lake, it seemed as if someone's shadow was flickering.

  I tiptoed over, lifted a corner of the white gauze, and took a sneak peek, almost spraying blood from my nose.

  Three big beauties taking a bath!

  Taking a bath alone is no fun, it's more enjoyable with many people! I want to take a bath too!

  I stripped off all my clothes in three seconds flat and was about to jump into the water. Although I used to dislike taking baths, now I've made up my mind

  Cultivate this good habit of keeping clean.

  A white pony flashes by, rushing straight towards me, its coolness is just like a snowflake that has landed on my forehead.

  I felt a chill in my chest, and before I could dodge, I was struck by a smooth, flying object. What hit me was a petal of a snow lotus flower. It fell to the ground and melted into a clear drop of water.

  Ji Danmei's laughter echoed from the center of the lake: "Little pervert, can you also take advantage of Gān Xiānzǐ's jade-like body?"

  I got up with a huff, put on my clothes, damn it, Gan Ning was so overbearing, hitting people without even saying hello. I came up with a plan, quietly went around to the other side of the lake, undid my belt, pulled out my little brother, and aimed at the water, shooting out all the pee that had been held in for a night.

  On the lake surface, urine splashed up and ripples spread out.

  Thinking of three beautiful women bathing in the lake with added ingredients, I laughed so hard that my belly hurts. When they come out later, they must smell like urine. Hehe, Long Die's urine is better than saliva, moisturizing the skin and beautifying, let the beauties bathe for a while longer.

  I strolled around for a while, walked into the woods, the trees were tall and lush, the colors were vibrant, I was like entering a kaleidoscope, sunlight filtered through the colorful branches, spot by spot, on the grassland, casting bright halos.

  It's really the north border, even the trees have so many colors.

  Many big trees have plump fruits that I've never seen before. Some are bright red, smooth and round, some are shining yellow, flat and wide like a big pancake, some are green and slender than cucumber, and some are as big as my head, covered with white fluffy hairs. The fruits are all ripe, bulging and crowded on the branches, emitting sweet fragrance.

  I was just thirsty, about to climb the tree, when I thought of trying my dragonfly claws. Standing under a tree full of purple-red berries, I concentrated on my brow, and the bright red sharp claws suddenly extended, grasping the lowest branch. "Ka Cha", the thick branch snapped loudly, and the fruit fell down like raindrops.

  "Quick catch!" My mind had just moved, and the red paw flew swiftly, my eyes saw where, the paws followed, catching a full scoop of cream fruit.

  The Dragon Butterfly Claw is truly boundless in power! I was exhilarated, darting from one tree to another, constantly plucking fruits and practicing the Dragon Butterfly Claw. I discovered that this arm covered with silver scales under my ribs could stretch out up to two meters, all at my will, extending and retracting freely.

  I practiced until I was drenched in sweat, my control becoming more and more refined, until finally, I could use it with complete ease, sending and receiving with a light touch. As soon as the thought occurred to me, the Red Claws would simultaneously shoot out, striking wherever I desired, no longer slow like before. With excitement rising, I let out a loud roar, spinning around like a whirlwind, my Red Claws sweeping horizontally backwards, in an absolutely fierce posture, uprooting a large tree from its roots.

  Mud splashed, and the fruit on the trees fell around me like bright raindrops. The fiery red long hair fluttered up, and gently fell in front of my forehead.

  "Lin Fei, you're too careless!" I shouted loudly. "Plop", several fruits heavily hit my head, and the red juice splattered all over my head and face.

  Damn it, so spicy! The fruit of this tree is both sour and spicy. The juice flows to the lips, like swallowing a ball of fire. I cough loudly, my eyes are so spicy that they can't be opened.

  Wiping my face dry, I started to distinguish which fruits were edible. In ancient times, the God of Agriculture tasted a hundred herbs; today, Lin Fei tastes a hundred fruits, not letting the ancients monopolize the beauty of the past.

  The grass was covered with small hills of fruit, all of which had been trampled by my paws. I carefully stretched out my tongue and tried one after another. The purple small berries were sour and sweet; the yellow big flat fruit was particularly hard and salty; the green fruit smelled fragrant but tasted like wax; the fruit covered in white hair had to be split open to eat, with its pulp grainy, like pink crystal, crisp and fresh, with a mouthful of sweet juice when bitten. The best-tasting one, however, was a kind of smelly and pungent fruit, which had sharp thorns on its surface, with its skin cracked open, revealing the yellow-orange pulp inside, sweet and rich. It's really true that you can't judge a fruit by its appearance, just like me, rough on the outside but precious on the inside.

  I let out a satisfied burp, rubbed my bulging belly, lay down on the soft grass, propped up my legs, and hummed a tune. The crisp bird songs jumped between the branches, bees buzzed around the flowers, the scent of honey and fruit filled the air, intertwined with the radiant sunlight, transparent and speckled, like a shimmering sea of light and color.

  "You're quite lively." A magnetic voice lazily came from behind, without lifting my head, I knew it was Ji Da Meiren.

  Ji Dan's eyes sparkled as she stared at me for a few moments: "A calamity that occurs once every ten years, and you're not worried about it at all?"

  I let out a hearty laugh: "What's there to worry about? I've always been the kind of person who'd use a collapsed sky as a quilt. Now I have food and drink, and three beautiful women to keep me company - it's much better than being in Luoyang!"

  "Jū Dān Mèi asked curiously: 'What was the world like where you used to live?'"

  I thought for half a day and still didn't know how to describe Luoyang. This place where I've lived for 16 years, suddenly feels very strange to me.

  Because it never truly accepted me.

  So I can only smile, bitterly smile.

  "You don't look like you're having a good time there?"

  "Who said that? I eat big fish and meat every day, wear silk and satin. Servants are like clouds, concubines are all beautiful. Stomp my foot, Luoyang City will shake three times." I was boasting non-stop, spitting saliva everywhere. How can I lose face in front of beauties? Ji Danmei was half-reclining at my feet, sideways, with her hand supporting her cheek, like a lazy big cat.

  "So, I'm having a great time! Extremely cool!" I shouted loudly, staring blankly at the sky.

  For sixteen years, I begged from door to door like a stray dog; rummaged through smelly garbage piles just to find some leftover rice; snuck into farmhouses at midnight to steal chickens and got beaten until my ribs were broken. I watched helplessly as my old man died of illness, unable to afford medicine.

  That year, Luoyang's winter was colder than ever. The wind and snow howled into the thatched hut, the broken window paper crackling loudly. I was both cold and hungry.

  Looking at my old dad lying in bed, I cried uncontrollably. Besides crying, I didn't know what to do. The room was dark and cold, the wind was like a thin and sharp knife. I gritted my teeth and used my body to block the window, not letting the cold wind blow in. But Dad was still shivering. Under the black and yellow cotton quilt, he kept trembling.

  We shivered together.

  I really want to curse the heavens for their cruelty, but I don't dare. Because I want to beg them to have mercy on me and save my dad's life.

  In a very distant place, there are firecrackers and beautiful fireworks. In the city of Luoyang, there are many children wearing satin cotton-padded jackets and tiger-head shoes, running around happily in the streets.

  I'm so envious, and also jealous. I know that I don't have the same fate as them. People are different, my life is cheap, our family can't compare with others. When other kids were eating sugar gourds and carrying rabbit lanterns, I could only turn my face away and quietly walk away.

  That was New Year's Eve night.

  I said, Dad, you'll get better. You promised me that during the New Year, we would eat dumplings and wear new clothes. My dad didn't say anything, he just looked at me, tears streaming down his face silently until he took his last breath.

  Heaven still didn't take pity on me. I stood in the thatched cottage like an ice cellar, motionless, listening to the increasingly loud firecrackers outside.

  Since then, I have never shed tears again.

  Because all the streams have dried up.

  The heavens won't grant me anything just because I beg and cry. The more it torments me, the more I refuse to give in. It makes me cry, but I'll smile instead.