The First Chapter: The Humble Taoist Suffers Heaven's Wrath; The Plum Mountain Monster Endures Lightning Bolts

  It is said that if a person is too cheap, he will be struck by lightning.

  At the foot of Mount Kongtong. Inside the tourist area.

  "Oh my, sir, you have a calamity of blood and light on your face, in five days you will lose your life! Come, come, I, the poor Taoist, have the virtue of good birth, I'll give you directions for free... Ah! Ah! Don't go, don't go! ...Damn it, he ran away faster than a rabbit!"

  "Boss, slow down! Hmm? I observe that your facial features suggest you're a person of great wealth and nobility. Why is the area between your eyebrows so dark?! Ah, no good! Within five days, you'll face the danger of losing a child! I'm the 222nd generation successor of the Tianji Observatory on Kongtong Mountain. Come, come, let me give you... what? You don't have a son? Cough, cough, doesn't a daughter count as half a child?! What?! You don't even have a daughter?! Ah, Infinite Heavenly Lord, adopted daughter, you must have an adopted daughter, right?! Ah! Don't move your hands! Don't move your hands! If you make another move, I won't be polite anymore! Damn it! I'll fight you to the death, watch my palm thunder, the urgent decree of the Supreme Old Lord! Grandfather, my dear grandfather, don't hit me in the face while eating mixed rice, okay?"

  "Hey, miss, wait a minute! Look at your face, it's not good at all. I calculated with my fingers and found out that you'll encounter an unexpected disaster within five days, and nine months later, there will be a fatal outcome! Come on, come on, I love to help people for fun, just give me a red envelope, and I'll guarantee you'll marry a rich and handsome guy!... Ah, you're taking out your phone?... Fine, you win!... Hey, that city management officer, I was just fortune-telling, not soliciting prostitution..."

  On the street, a thin Taoist priest with a crooked headscarf, a blue nose and a swollen face, holding his head and scurrying away, was being fiercely chased by a team of city administrators behind him, while people all around were shouting and hitting, it was really chaotic.

  At the same time, in the sky above, dark clouds gathered and thunder rumbled loudly.

  "Damn it! I, the poor Taoist, have done nothing to deceive women or cheat children, what kind of thunder is this, what kind of lightning is this? Disperse at once!" The Taoist ran while waving his sleeves at the sky with a loud "Hong Hong", revealing an aura of infinite majesty.

  Boom! Crack!

  A bolt of heavenly lightning, mixed with nine kinds of thunder and lightning, arrived in an instant, accompanied by a mournful cry that could destroy the world. The Taoist was struck right on target and turned to dust!

  "Wow, wife, come and see the fairy!"

  "Great man, indeed a great man, even being struck by lightning is so majestic..."

  ……

  The headlines of the newspaper read: "Swindler Huang Da Xian from this city was struck by lightning, a heavenly punishment for his deceitful ways."

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  Zhao Ge City is five hundred miles south. A large mountain range.

  The mountain calls for plum blossoms, but it's a place of evil mountains and wicked waters. Why is that? Just look: the black wind stirs, a hundred flowers lower their heads, poisonous miasma rises, and everything falls into chaos. A group of deer flee in panic, a pheasant with a red ribbon on its head flies up to the sky, a hawk swoops down on a rabbit, two golden lions with twin phoenix wings drag along a hat. A black eagle takes off, a swan falls from the sky, vicious dogs arrive and knock over a deer with plum blossoms on its antlers, tigers roar in the forest, how can white deer escape alive? A bear monster opens its mouth wide, a leopard's blood splatters all over its body red, a python emerges from its den, feathers cover the ground, struggling to spread out.

  At the mountain pass, two steep peaks blocked half of the sky, and a narrow winding path emerged, like a long tongue spat out by the mountain demon.

  On the hillside, dozens of little demons were lying horizontally and vertically, all of whom were disciples of eating flesh and drinking blood. It was exactly noon, the sun was scorching, and they were all dried up like noodles.

  Not far away under a half-dead ancient sky cedar, three mountain demons were lying.

  "Bad luck, bad luck! Three days in a row without even half a drop of blood food! If I miss again today, how can I face the old ancestor when I return?" The first one was a sturdy and fat giant with protruding fangs, huge palms like millstones, and appeared to be a black bear monster.

  "Ah San, what's your idea?" Next to him was a white and chubby one with thick lips and big ears, looking silly and lovely, but when speaking, the sparkling eyes were shining brightly.

  On the top of the ancient cypress tree, a monster was lying, with a pointed mouth and a flat nose, its body was thin and small, with triangular eyes, a collapsed nose, wind-catching ears, and a messy hair. Its body was covered with black fur, and it wore a short skirt made of tiger skin around its waist. It looked extremely strange and evil. Its face was also red and purple, as if it had been scratched, and some places were even bleeding.

  "Second Master, don't tease me, I'm annoyed." Ah San looked lackluster, turned over, and let out a long sigh.

  "What's wrong with Ah San?" Hei Xiong Guai poked the person next to him, "Ah Er".

  Ah Er couldn't help but chuckle, and let out a sly laugh: "It's just that last night at the third watch, I snuck into Feng Jie's room to try my luck, but ended up getting fondled by her instead."

  "Ah!" The black bear nodded heavily, filled with sympathy, and drew a circle of crosses on Ah San's back: "Ah San, Feng Jie's body odor can kill all the chickens on a mountain. I thought you were just not smart, but I didn't expect you to have such a heavy taste."

  "The three masters have arrived! They've arrived!" Just as the three were chattering, a small demon who was sent by Shanmen to spread the news came running over with a joyful expression.

  As soon as this was said, the two monsters were overjoyed, rubbed their fists and palms, stretched out their heads, and looked around with flashing eyes.

  But then on the dirt road, a group of people and horses slowly appeared.

  There are not many people, but there are over a hundred. The atmosphere is tense and intimidating.

  The banners are divided into five colors, and the killing intent fills the air. The swords, spears, guns, and knives shine brightly, and the halberds, axes, and clubs gleam with a fierce light.

  The soldiers leap and jump like ferocious tigers and wolves descending from the high mountains; the war horses whinny loudly, and the iron armor and golden helmets leave the desolate plains.

  The leader is a small but fierce general, accompanied by cunning foxes. The shield-bearing soldiers protect the military rations, while the crossbowmen and archers shoot at the enemy's feet.

  Among the crowd of people and horses, a wooden wheel carriage moved slowly, with gold inlays and jade pendants, surrounded by wisps of incense. Beside the carriage, several deputy generals formed a tight protective circle, impenetrable as a flood.

  At the forefront of the team, a great general had a face as white as jade, eyes like bright stars, long hair hanging down to his chest, thick eyebrows and a heroic appearance. He wore a helmet with a purple gold crest and a white feather, a suit of armor with interlocking rings, a large red robe, a white jade belt, and held a golden spear with a pike made of lu bamboo. The five-colored divine cow beast was truly majestic and awe-inspiring.

  Behind him, a large flag fluttered in the wind, rustling loudly, with golden and silver embroidery, a single character as big as a bowl, but two strange eyes couldn't recognize it.

  "Grandma's, one day without opening, open and eat for three days! Just worrying about the old ancestor's place having no way to explain, a team of inferior goods came! Little ones, shake your spirits, follow me down the mountain to kill!" Black bear monster hehe smiled, holding up the hand-held peach blossom axe, ready to do a thrilling killing and looting business.

  "Master brother, slow down." Beside him, "Ah Er" swept his eyes over the group of people and felt something was off.

  "What's the big deal?" The black bear monster was impatient and annoyed, saying: "A group of foolish mortals, it's just right to send them to be food for the blood, isn't it?

  Looking at the black bear's sharp teeth and big mouth, Ah Er smiled: "Master has passed the tribulation of Lianxu Hedo, and soon he will be a true immortal. Dealing with these people is naturally easy, no wonder I thought the other side had some background, so they dared to rush up like this. If we kill a few of them, it would be hard to explain to Master."

  Although he said so, Ah Er's heart was filled with contempt for the black bear: You're a piece of trash, that person is obviously a troublemaker who's not easy to mess with. Go and die if you want, I still have to live a good life with my dear little Yuanyuan.

  "What should we do then?" The black bear monster had well-developed limbs but a simple mind, and it seemed to think that Ah Er's words made some sense.

  "This way, you and Ah San will lead the men to fight, I'll go back to ask Old Ancestor to come out in person, then there's no chance of failure." said Ah Er.

  Hei Xiong Guai thought Ah Er's words were impressive! He nodded his head, and with one hand, he picked up Ah San from under the ancient cypress tree. Smiling, he said: "Ah San, let's split into two groups with our second brother. My great axe combined with your demonic wind will make for a thrilling battle, what do you say?"

  A San agreed as he was also feeling suffocated by Feng Jie's gloominess and needed to vent out his frustrations.

  So the three men split into two groups, Ah Er slipped back to report the news, and Hei Xiong Guai took Ah San and shouted as they went out.

  "Alright, little ones! Finish this task and go back to receive your reward from the old ancestor!" The black bear monster spat a mouthful of saliva onto his palm, rubbed it in, grasped his large axe, and charged down the mountain. Immediately after, there was a cacophony of wailing and howling behind him.

  "Kill! Don't let a single one escape!"

  "The beauty in the car belongs to me!"

  "Kill him off cleanly!"

  ……

  On the mountain peak, a dark and eerie aura rose, startling countless birds into flight. Over a hundred mountain demons surged forward, their magical smoke billowing forth, soon alarming the group of people at the foot of the mountain.

  "Enemy attack!"

  "Form up!"

  "Protect the lady!"

  In an instant, they formed a circular array, with knives, guns, swords, spears, axes, hooks and forks shining brightly, emitting a fierce killing aura.

  "Take a blast of divine wind from your ancestor Huang San!" Ah San's speed was extremely fast, charging to the front, letting out a cold laugh, opening his mouth and spitting out a black crystal bead. Instantly, a wave of dark and eerie wind swept in, blowing over boulders, changing the color of the sky, blocking out the sun and moon. The opposing team was blown so hard they couldn't see clearly, panicking and falling into chaos.

  "Ah San, well done! Little ones, kill for me!" The black bear monster looked at Ah San with satisfaction, let out a loud roar, and swung the giant axe in his hand fiercely!

  Rumble.

  The two groups of people were about to collide with each other, but no one noticed that a thunderstorm had suddenly appeared in the sky.

  Crack crack crack!

  A bolt of lightning struck directly in front of the two armies' formation, rolling up countless balls of thunder, fire dragons roaming about, and exploding with a loud crash.

  Rumble! Rumble! Rumble!

  Although humans are born of human mothers and demons are born of demon mothers, under the heavenly thunderbolt, whether they be human or demon, all will be killed or injured!

  The unlucky Ah San who rushed to the front became the most direct victim.

  The largest thunderball wrapped itself around it, and under the gaze of everyone, it exploded with a loud bang, smoke and dust flying everywhere!

  Winning the bid, it's absolutely a once-in-a-thousand-years winning bid!

  Just a moment ago, the two groups of people were shouting and killing each other, but now they are all disheveled and dirty, with messy hair like a chicken's nest. They look at each other in shock, their eyes wide with surprise, and suddenly they are all stunned into silence.

  The dust settled, and a large pit appeared on the ground. Inside the pit, Ah San was lying in a stiff corpse-like state, his mouth crooked and eyes slanted, having been chopped into charcoal.

  "Ah! You bunch of two-legged beasts, how dare you kill my Ah San! Take a swing from me!" The black bear monster's eyes were wide with rage, his hand rose and the axe fell, several soldiers' big heads rolled on the ground like watermelons.

  "Kill! Avenge the Three Great Kings!"

  "Avenge the Three Great Kings!"

  "Feng Jie, you must be strong!"

  A group of little demons shouted slogans of all kinds, flames of anger soaring into the sky, and they charged forward with a battle cry.

  "Cough, cough, cough!" Amidst the sounds of slaughter, a faint coughing sound came from the large pit, followed by a loud and clear curse: "Infinite Heavenly Lord! I'm not done with you yet! You're just a piece of trash! City management is useless! I'll rob you blind! Hmph!"

  Charcoal-like Ah San crawled out of the pit, and everything in front of him left him stunned.

  What is this?!

  Ouch!

  A dark shadow flew over, Ah San subconsciously caught it, only to find that it was a huge dead black bear head.

  "Taishang Town's Guo Wu Cheng Wang Huang Feihu is here! You demon dare to snatch my wife, you will die!" At the moment when Ah San was stunned with his arms around Hei Xiong's head, he saw a man like an iron tower opposite him, urging on the Five-Colored Divine Cow, holding high the golden spear and the bamboo staff, rushing towards him with furious anger.

  "This is... I've crossed over?! ... Great Merchant? ... Town National Wu Cheng Wang! ? ... That, Lord Huang! Old Master Huang! I'm not a demon, I didn't think of snatching your wife! I just passed by... I really am selling soy sauce!"

  From the battlefield came Ah San's wailing cries like a mourner at a funeral.

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  Fellow Taoist friends! Xiao Zhang's new book is out, "The Supreme God" is awesome! Please collect and recommend it to everyone! I'm done here, thanks!