Chapter 55: The Emperor is Just a Big Garlic Clove

  Five Drunken Immortals' Towers opened simultaneously in Luoyang City, causing a great stir. Even Emperor Han Ling of the Northern Palace heard about it from his gossipy eunuchs. Emperor Liu Hong was not very sensitive to other things, but he had two passions: women and money.

  Liu Hong heard that the Drunken Immortal Pavilion was making a fortune right under his nose, and he immediately felt itchy in his heart. He hastily summoned Zhang Rang, the head of the "Ten Eunuchs", to think of ways to take a bite out of Zhao Xing and the Drunken Immortal Pavilion!

  As for Emperor Ling of Han, Liu Hong, there's indeed something to talk about. First, let's review a term for our readers: "Dirty Tang and Stinky Han" - "Dirty Tang" refers to the behaviors between Wu Zetian and Li Xian, Yang Guifei and Li Longji, these mothers and sons, fathers and daughters-in-law; while the protagonist of "Stinky Han" is this very Liu Hong.

  Emperor Ling of Han, Liu Hong, is one of the over 200 emperors in Chinese history who had a trashy political performance. People remember him because he came up with the idea that all women in the palace should wear open-crotch pants, and another reason is his crazy behavior of selling official positions and titles.

  The purpose of reforming open-crotch pants is not to be novel and pursue fashion, but to make it convenient for Emperor Ling of Han to do that thing. According to records, Emperor Ling of Han had relations with 121 palace maids in half a month, which requires him to be convenient and quick when visiting the palace maids, otherwise there won't be enough time. This decadent person died at the age of 36, purely playing with women to death!

  Born from a prestigious family in the north, Cui Lie, who had served as a county governor and an official in the imperial court, spent 5 million taels of silver to buy the position of Minister of Works. On the day of his appointment, the palace held a grand ceremony, with Emperor Ling attending and all officials standing solemnly below the steps. Looking at Cui Lie's triumphant expression, Emperor Ling suddenly felt that Cui Lie had obtained the position too easily and couldn't help but express his regret to his attendants, saying: "I regret not asking for less, it could have been 10 million!" The eunuch standing beside him interrupted, saying: "He was already very generous with 5 million. A renowned scholar from Hebei like Cui Gong would never easily buy an official position! Your Majesty doesn't know how much effort I put into this!" Afterwards, Cui Lie's son said to his father: "Sir, you really shouldn't have taken this position. People outside are gossiping and complaining that this official has a 'coppery smell'." The term 'coppery smell' originated from this incident.

  "Uncle, have there been any strange or unusual events happening in Luoyang recently?" Liu Hong asked Zhang Rang indirectly.

  "I humbly report to Your Majesty, I haven't heard of any new developments in Luoyang recently." A big man rushed into the palace and Zhang Rang didn't know what Liu Hong was thinking, so he just muddled through.

  "How did I hear that within Luoyang City, five wine shops with the same signboard opened in one day, selling a jar of wine for one jin of gold? It's really making a huge profit!" Liu Hong said discontentedly.

  "Oh, Your Majesty mentioned this matter, I also know a thing or two about it." Zhang Rang, who had received a large bribe from Zhao Xing, began to deceive the Emperor, "Those five wine houses originally existed, but they simultaneously changed their signboards to those of Zui Xian Lou. The purpose was to sell Chang He Da Qu, a product of Shangdang. I've heard that the brewing process of Chang He Da Qu is complicated and wastes a lot of grain, so the price is also expensive. However, the wine is indeed a high-quality brew."

  "Oh, it's a fine wine, why wasn't it presented to the palace? Let me also taste a little?" Liu Hong asked angrily.

  "It's not that the wine merchant is unwilling, but actually it's because he's afraid that the Emperor's body can't withstand the strong flavor of the burning wine. He'll only dare to present it to His Majesty after we've tried it and found no harm!" Zhang Rang explained with great sweat.

  "It's still Father who thinks thoroughly!" After listening to Zhang Rang's explanation, Liu Hong felt greatly relieved. "I don't know if I can drink this wine after you and the others have tasted it?"

  "It's a drink, a drink, that long river has many flavors, some are quite elegant, the emperor and concubines can also drink it." Zhang Rang didn't care about anything else at this time, and directly sold off the Drunken Immortal Pavilion.

  "That's not enough! Quickly issue an imperial decree to have the Drunken Immortal Pavilion present their finest wines to the palace!" Liu Hong said discontentedly, humming through his nose.

  "Alright, I'll go and do it!" Zhang Rang, who had received the imperial edict, ran out of the Northern Palace with a group of eunuchs, hurrying to the nearest tavern outside the palace, "Fu Yang Lou - Drunken Immortal Pavilion".

  As soon as they entered the building, Zhang Rang was a familiar customer here and directly found Du Boss of the wine house. He said to him: "Quickly go find Shang Tang Xiaolian and County Magistrate Zhao Guochang to come back and talk, the Emperor wants to drink Changhe Daqu!"

  After hearing this, Du Boss didn't dare to slack off and immediately ran to the courtyard of "Yonghe Li" that Zhao Xingxin had just bought to shout for people. The eunuch in front of him, Du Boss, couldn't be provoked, let alone Zhao Xing. It was these eunuchs who vied with the outer relatives for power and interest back then, and finally overthrew the outer relatives Duan's family and soft-imprisoned Empress Dowager Dou, seizing power and killing more than 100 righteous students including Li Ying and Fan Rong, exiling and detaining more than 800 people. Most of these people died miserably in prison, causing the second "Party Prohibition Disaster".

  "Zhao Dongjia, something's wrong! The Emperor has sent the eunuch Zhang Rang to look for you, saying that the palace wants to drink Changhe Daqu!" Du Laozhu rushed into Zhao Xing's courtyard like a gust of wind, shouting towards the house.

  "Still, he really thought he was a big shot! He just opens his mouth to drink and I have to deliver it to him personally..." Zhao Xing muttered under his breath as he got up from Hu Xiang'er's body.

  "Hehe, your husband is really bold, he even dares to scold the emperor!" Hu Yan'er whispered in Zhao Xing's ear, reluctant to part with him.

  "Dare to disturb me when I'm busy, even if it's the emperor, I'll scold him!" Zhao Xing said while putting on his clothes, continuing to vent his grievances.

  Zhao Xing, who was dressed up and ready, followed Old Du to the Drunken Immortal Building in Beiguan in a flash.

  "Oh dear, Lord Zhang, what wind has blown you here! I, Guo Chang, pay my respects to you!" As soon as he entered the door, Zhao Xing's demeanor changed completely from just scolding even the emperor, and with a flattering smile, he approached Zhang Rang.

  But Zhao Xing and the powerful eunuch Zhang Rang were not meeting for the first time. When Jia Xu bought his official position, he had already laid the groundwork. Some days earlier, as soon as Zhao Xing entered Luoyang City, he hurriedly sent a large cart of wine to Zhang Rang's residence, and at that time, Zhang Rang was so delighted that he almost wanted to recognize Zhao Xing as his adopted son.

  "Guo Chang, it's not that our family doesn't want to speak up for you, but the Emperor has somehow heard from those who should have their tongues cut off about your Drunken Immortal Pavilion in Luoyang City making a fortune. He's taken a liking to your wine shop and wants it for himself. You'd better be careful and not go against the Emperor's wishes. Business is small, but one's life is big..." Zhang Yan scolded Zhao Xing in a stern tone, as if teaching his own son.

  "Your words are extremely right, Guo Chang will remember them in his heart. But I don't know how to resolve this unpredictable heavenly wrath?" Zhao Xing said with a nod and a bow, then turned around and handed over a tray of gold that he had brought along to Zhang Rang.

  Zhang Rang, being an old hand at accepting bribes, directly and unceremoniously had his subordinate receive a heavy tray of gold, then leaned in close to Zhao Xing's ear and whispered: "Wanting to please the Emperor is not difficult, you just need to do this and that..."

  "Thanks for the reminder, Uncle!" Zhao Xing replied helplessly.